Do You Genuinely Appreciate Your Gifts?

How many gifts from the Universe and the Earth do you have in your life right now? How many of them do you genuinely appreciate, and why does this matter?

That first question isn’t meant to be a trick question, but in essence it is… because everything is a gift from the Universe and/or the Earth. We do ourselves a huge disservice by not recognizing or acknowledging this Truth.

Almost two decades ago, a friend sent me a garment unlike any I’d ever worn before. I told her that, and that I wasn’t sure how to use it. Her reply was, “If you can’t figure out what to do with THAT, send it back!” Her statement may seem strong, but it was important to hear. How many gifts do we receive from the Universe, and the Earth, that we don’t, initially (or ever), figure out how to use properly and, therefore, we don’t fully appreciate them? Imagine the Universe or the Earth making the same statement my friend did regarding anything that comes to you or that you currently have. Kind of amps up the message, doesn’t it?

We love our conveniences; and though we may appreciate them, our familiarity with them (as well as, perhaps, lack of proper guidance and training) may cause us to disconnect from deeper, true appreciation. Let’s look at a meal as an example, whether you prepare it or someone else does. Even if you say a blessing before you eat, do you really mean it or do you say it because it’s expected? And, is it a thorough blessing that allows you to merge your personal empowerment with your appreciation?

Here’s an example you might test for yourself. While you cook or before you take the first bite of a meal or snack, say silently or aloud: I give thanks to everything and everyone that contributed to this food being available for me. I give thanks to the Earth for providing everything used in the preparation and in the serving and eating of it. I give thanks to the molecules of this food for the nourishment they give to my body, mind, and spirit. I give thanks to every molecule of my body for using every molecule of this food to support my optimum health, well-being, and energy, while helping me maintain my ideal weight of (number). If you happen to forget until after you eat, say or think it then.

That last part about the weight maintenance may have surprised you; but how often do we eat something and rather than enjoy and appreciate the food, and state our truest intention about the nourishment, do we do the opposite? Far too often. There is so much, everything, really, to appreciate every day, every moment; but our own disconnect to genuine appreciation causes us to USE without grace or, worse, Abuse without conscience or awareness.

When we feel appreciated, we feel fulfillment and joy about giving. When we appreciate what we receive or have, we create ripples of fulfillment and joy outward, including to the Earth and the Universe. This is an expansive energy that is responded to in kind. We feel larger when we’re in a state of appreciation because, in spirit and expression, we are. Lack of appreciation contracts our energy, makes us smaller in spirit, self-absorbed, cut off from more. More awaits us. But appreciation is the language we must feel, as well as speak, in order to keep that line of communication and receptive exchange open and flowing.

The meal example is an easy one to follow; but what about everything else in your life, especially anything or anyone so familiar or routine in your life that you “forget” to appreciate its or their presence? If you think you’re too busy to appreciate in this way, maybe you’re too much about busyness because you don’t appreciate in this way.

Look around your home, office, life, relationships. If there’s anything (or anyone) there you have no true appreciation for, remove or exchange it as soon as it’s reasonable to do so. If your life, inner or material, is cluttered with what you really don’t want and therefore don’t appreciate, you may not be able to readily appreciate what you do have that you do want.

Please be cautions not to insert self-judgment (convincing/fooling yourself) by believing if you don’t feel appreciation all the time, you’re failing, so why bother. You’re building a skill and way of being, as you might a set of muscles. To reach full development takes time and practice. Know that any moment you feel the opposite of appreciation can become an opportunity (as soon as you’re ready) to ask right questions and to learn something that can assist you as you continue forward. Keep in mind that sometimes what you learn is what to let go of. Knowing this is something to appreciate. "Knowledge is learning something new every day. Wisdom is letting go of something every day." -Zen Proverb

As you take such assessment about anything and anyone in your life, which you can do in each moment, hear the Universe say to you, “If you can’t figure out how to put THIS into proper use and appreciate it, return it.” It’s an interesting thought and an interesting practice to follow.

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce Shafer

Does Your Attitude Have You Stuck?

Do one or more parts of your life make you feel like you’re wandering in a wilderness, and you can’t find the exit? Maybe it’s time to see this for what it really is.

Three definitions of wilderness in my dictionary are: barren, empty land; a large, confused mass or tangle; a wild condition or quality. Circumstances sometimes feel like a wilderness experience, that is, as one of the definitions offered here. But the most prevalent or consistent wilderness experience happens in our mind.

Your choice of thoughts and words are influenced by your attitude, and your attitude is influenced by your thoughts and words, a sort of yin/yang situation. Stay the same, and you travel in a circle or loop. Tweak this, and you leave the loop for the evolving spiral that can carry you forward.

Your words, which come from your thoughts, have power over you and what you attract. Your attitude not only attracts your experiences but perpetuates your circumstances. Ernest Holmes wrote: “You cannot heal anyone of his trouble, if it is the result of some mental attitude which he will not surrender.” Circumstances change over time, but our mind changes only when we decide to change it.

Most of us enter and exit wildernesses throughout life (wilderness happens to each of us), while others merge more than one wilderness into one big one and wander around in there for years or a lifetime. How long have you talked about, thought about, the same “old” things? How long will this continue? Do you really want things to change? Are you more committed to change or to talking about why nothing changes? That’s like complaining about your untidy home or office and never tidying it.

Those who look only at their circumstances and not their attitude complain often, because they don’t see (don’t look) beyond circumstances. Here are some popular wilderness-attitude statements: I can’t, because . . . (Different from “I won’t,” which is a choice); I know I shouldn’t, but . . .; It’s not my fault, it’s the fault of . . .; Nothing ever changes; I give up. People stuck in the wilderness, and that’s each of us at one time or another during our lifetime, tend to blame lack of progress on others or situations. Yes, stuff happens, and sometimes it can take a while to recover in whatever way is needed; but we can move ourselves out of and beyond such wilderness experiences sooner with an attitude adjustment. Stuff happens. Stuff will always happen.

Just as you may be proficient at looking at something negative and thinking it could happen to you, you can do the same for positive circumstances. Consider your thoughts. When you wake, what thoughts do you have? Or, do your thoughts have you? Are they thoughts of appreciation or of grievances? Your first thoughts of the day are akin to you choosing a healthy or an unhealthy breakfast, which influences how you perform for at least the first part of your day, if not the rest of it.
We have a spiritual power within us. We have the Law of Attraction. And, we have the God Force to assist us with anything and everything. What trips us up and keeps us stuck is that we want to see (insist on) a demonstration of improvement outside of us before we demonstrate improvement inside.

If your attitude doesn’t serve you, you have to decide whether you’ll surrender that attitude and take up a new one… or not. However, if you choose to keep an unsupportive attitude, also be willing to choose to own your choice and not blame others for how you choose to be. Tie this in to the fact that you prepare your future in the present.

How can you begin your exodus from a wilderness situation? Do what can, even if you think what you can do won’t be enough. Do this, and you’ll find the Creative Consciousness helps you with the rest, as is appropriate for you. Sometimes, what you can do is an action, but you can always do something about your thoughts, words, and attitude. Doing so is called your demonstration of your willingness to step out of your self-imposed wilderness or any wilderness you find yourself in. Such a demonstration is powerful; and the more you practice such demonstrations, the more your power grows.

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce Shafer

What Key Ingredient Is Needed for Joy?

You can choose joy as easily as you can choose any emotion. But you won’t enjoy your life as much as you could unless you include one key ingredient.

Do you enjoy what you have: your key relationships, material items, spiritual awareness and connection to Source, personal traits and characteristics? If you can’t enjoy who you are and what you have now, how will you enjoy even more? This may seem contradictory but it isn’t. It reminds me of two thought streams: “Wherever you go there you are” and “I’ll be happy when…”

You can choose to enjoy on purpose. What’s the key ingredient that helps you do this? Appreciation. If you genuinely appreciate something or someone, you’ll enjoy or find joy in it or them. Appreciation and joy are magnetic and attract more. If “more” seems elusive, check your level of appreciation for what you are and have. It’s likely a quart or more low. You can simplify your understanding of how Law of Attraction works by remembering appreciation attracts more to appreciate; lack of appreciation attracts less to appreciate.

Here are some common joy stealers we all come across:

*We may be good at saying Yes to please others when what we need to be good at is saying No to please or nurture peace in us.

*We may be controlling, manipulating, or workaholics, which is about trying to make life and others do what we want, whether what we want is aligned with the highest good of all involved or not.

*We may not be readily aware of what causes us to feel appreciation and therefore joy, so we don’t deliberately seek to experience more of those things.

*Our primary motivation is to get, with little to no motivation to give.

*We work for a paycheck only, with little to no thought of bringing our light into the workplace or to be a blessing to at least one person each day.

*We form relationships with others, maybe even marry someone, so they can “make” us happy, ignoring the fact we’re responsible for our own happiness.

*We forget that making others happy will bring us joy.

*We speak more negatives than positives; we don’t stop to think or choose better words before we speak.

*We believe being joyful contrasts with being caring; believing that with all that goes on in the world, we have no right or reason to be joyful.

The day I decided to write this article, “stuff” was hitting the fan, so to speak. Was I enjoying it or able to find joy? Did I even feel like looking for joy? No. But my own words were fresh in my mind. About two hours into the “stuff,” I heard chirping. On a shrub outside my window was a splendid cardinal. THAT brought me joy! I watched it for a few minutes then went back to what I was doing. The cardinal visited again; and again I got up to watch it and express appreciation. The cardinal’s visits reminded me that although some events are far from joyful, reasons to connect with appreciation and joy are all around us, even amid “stuff” happening.

We definitely have to pay attention to what we say to ourselves. This is crucial. We can convince ourselves that something is true: positive or negative. One brings us reasons to be appreciative; the other, to perceive there’s nothing to appreciate.

Lack of appreciation causes us to miss the good, the beautiful, the blessings. It causes us to shut off the stream of well-being we could enjoy. It causes us to give away our joy and, instead, live angry or upset with or about everyone and everything or something a majority of the time. And all the while, this is a choice.

Appreciation eases or displaces anger and other negative emotions and nurtures joy or, at least, peace. Appreciation is assisted by what we tell ourselves. Too few make the connection between what we tell ourselves, how we feel based on what we tell ourselves, and what we attract because of this.

We do not control all external circumstances, but we can manage our inner environment. What we do about this affects us most of all, but also affects those we interact with. When we lack appreciation, we steal our own joy; and inadvertent or not, we affect the joy of others.

Look at your key relationships, your material items, your spiritual awareness and connection to Source, and your personal traits and characteristics. Find what you appreciate and find what more you can appreciate about these.

If you want more joy, be more joyful. If you want more joy, be deliberate about your appreciation. State your appreciation. Choose a state of appreciation. And know that you will need to renew this commitment to yourself and your joy every day, and maybe several times a day. Put this into practice and you’ll begin to notice it not only gets easier to do, but more natural to do than not to.

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce Shafer

Trained Thought Is More Powerful Than Untrained

Can you always practice right thinking? I don’t know. But you CAN always practice adjusting your thoughts to right thinking.


The thing to know – the “trick,” if you want to call it that – is to KNOW that you DO and CAN influence the Law of Attraction in your regard and in each moment… with right thinking. Law of Attraction is receptive, not reluctant. We imagine; and the Law creates in accord with what we imagine. Because of this we are wise to keep in mind these words of Ernest Holmes: “There is a great difference between conscious and unconscious thought for trained thought is far more powerful than untrained…. Even a small amount of right thought puts to rout that which is wrong.”

We sometimes – or often – practice what Holmes called “unconscious, or innocent, malpractice” in our life. “It is malpractice because it is the wrong use of thought; innocent because it is not intended to harm….” His example was of a mother’s thoughts and comments that her unwell child was a poor, little sick one. Such feelings are understandable, but we’re often unaware of the result of that kind of mental action, and how it imprints our energy field and the energy field(s) of those it’s directed toward.

There are other ways the mother could use right thinking about this, starting with the realization and affirmation that the child is a spiritual being first and foremost, not “just” an unwell one. This doesn’t mean to ignore the health condition. Treat it! Do what needs doing about any condition. But know it’s a condition. “Disease is a fact but not a truth; it is an experience but not a spiritual reality,” Holmes wrote. Try this: replace the word “disease” with any word that describes what you consider a negative condition, and see the truth of his statement.

We could say we do this form of malpractice over one or more areas of our life, even after we’re informed about it. We do this about present-time matters; but each time we repeat thoughts silently or aloud about the past, we re-imprint those experiences into our energy field. We re-experience the past, emotionally, once again, forgetting that this level of thought attracts similar – or more of the same – events to us. We CAN remember that we can CHOOSE to imprint positive, as well as negative memories into our energy field.

What is right thinking, and how can we practice it?

Consider this thought from a broader perspective: We experience from life what we think into it. So, it’s important to have a constructive foundation for your thinking about the “fact” of an experience, as well as the deeper spiritual truth about it. Right thinking provides answers, solutions, and resolutions. It provides the power to heal, whatever that healing may represent. Retrain yourself to think what you prefer to think. Do the same for how you prefer to feel and be – about any and every experience, with the intention to enhance your conscious awareness, not just your experiences.

It isn’t just about thinking right thoughts, though; it’s Knowing the Truth about this… its influence and effects. Know your mind. You see a reflection of your mind when you look at your experiences and when you look at your responses to your experiences. Your state of mind influences your external experience and determines your experience of the external. Your state of mind is the result of what you think, what you know, and what you think you know. And, this can always be enhanced. Observe, learn, and retrain thoughts as needed.
Don’t judge your experiences, because they are there to help you to awaken your mind and heart, to awaken conscious awareness, to awaken your knowing of the Law of Attraction and to use it for your good and the good of others… from this day on. Know that your word – thought, felt or spoken – becomes Law, don’t just intellectualize this. You attain KNOWING by observing, by linking your thoughts to what you experience. To judge any of this would be to shift your focus away from where it’s meant to be.

I’ve been programming my mind with the nightly thought that I have one or more dreams that cause me to have clarity, focus, enthusiasm, and joy about every endeavor I engage the next day. One morning while making coffee, and still in the alpha brainwave state where the mind is easily programmed, I found myself “entertaining” negative thoughts. I stopped myself and acknowledged that if I’m going to ask for assistance, then I have to follow through on my end of it. It just doesn’t work to request one thing and think, feel, or do the opposite, which negates my request. I also keep in mind that endeavors and events may require me to use only one or two of these at a time, rather than all four, depending on what’s going on. But for a general daily approach, I find it’s a good one for me.

Use right thinking not just when you’re in a good mood, but especially when you’re not. I’m not saying you’re to ignore or disregard your feelings and emotions, but if you understand what I’m saying here, you’ll understand why right thinking is important to YOU. Your feelings and emotions are messengers, but you have to choose what to do about the messages. Will you choose wrong (disempowered) thinking or right (empowered) thinking? Consider the results you desire.

The more untrained the thinking, the more inclined a person is to let emotions rule the behavior, instead of allowing conscious awareness to lead the way. You can feel - as you are designed and meant to - without letting emotions run amok or allow them to run your behaviors. Information provided through feelings, blended with right thinking is a powerful combination. It can lead you to experience peace with poise.

The more we connect with spiritual Reality, and not just the “fact” of an experience, the greater our opportunity is to shift – either the outcome based on the “facts,” or our deeper understanding; though, both may shift as a result. This helps us shift from wishing to Knowing, usually knowing a greater truth. It is the difference between mental force (which doesn’t work) and mental acceptance (which is based on deeper conscious awareness).

Are your responses to any matter yours or learned ones? Would thought retraining benefit you? Trained thought is more powerful – and more relaxed and relaxing – than untrained. Appreciate that you can choose to retrain yourself into right thinking, that you can adjust into right thinking as and when appropriate. Appreciate that trained thinking opens you to a different, improved experience of your life, no matter what it temporarily appears to be like.

Any knowledge that stays on the surface has not taken root. For it to take root, you have to put it into practice. You CAN think yourself into greater personal power and a better experience of life and “facts.” It’s a good practice.

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce Shafer

Which of Your Selves Is More Sacred to You?

You have a spiritual self and a material self that operates in the world. Which do you nurture first? How’s that working for you?

You have a “foot in two worlds.” One foot is in the spiritual world, which is where you come from, where you return to, though, that world stays with you through your human experience. The other foot is in the material world that is heavily influenced by society. Which world is more sacred to you? Are we meant to choose one or the other?

Society tells you that it is the authority about who you are and how you can define yourself. It tells you what you deserve based on its material-world view. It tells you what you can have and what you have to do to get it. Basically, society “allows” you to be, do, and have based on its viewpoint that changes with the wind. And that wind blows in a circumscribed area. This means society decides, describes, and defines limitation for you. It convinces you that validation comes from outside you; that it comes from society, which is comprised of far too many others to know whom to please and in what ways.

Your spiritual self recognizes there is a divine order at work at all times, and that the Divine is without limitations. It recognizes that this divine order means there is a divine purpose in and for all things. The more engaged with your spiritual self that you are, the more these aspects resonate within you and ripple outward into and through your life experience.

Your spiritual self is aware of and uses – to the degree you allow it – intuition. This means you can tap into, flow with, divine order and purpose, as often as you allow yourself to do this. In this state of Mind and Being, you don’t always need to understand what the Divine is doing, or why, when, or how – until you do.

In the spiritual world, you have experiences that are personal and valid – and validated by Spirit, experiences that many in society wouldn’t validate as “real” or worth pursuing. But, kindred others who follow a spiritual path would understand.

Each of us always has a choice as to whether the material or spiritual world is more sacred to us. This doesn’t mean we are to shun the material world. After all, we live in it. We use it and contribute (hopefully) to its existence. The material world is part of our sustenance just as we are part of its sustenance.

But, which world nurtures you first and most? Which one encourages you first and most to be, do, and have in the ways you desire? Which one encourages you first and most to be your authentic self? Which world is the source of your authority? Which one do you usually choose as your source of authority in and of all things?
Society is like your body. And though the body is an amazing compilation of cells performing specific tasks in order to support the “whole,” it is nothing – it cannot exist – without consciousness. It performs and functions even better with conscious awareness.

One of these worlds holds the frequency of love in greater, natural abundance and asks you often, What is sacred to you? The one that is more sacred to you is the one you will nurture first and most.

We too often hold onto what keeps us unhappy or discontent or unfulfilled, because we may have to really look at ourselves and change something. Society has predominantly taught us to value and rely on the known, according to its definitions of acceptable “knowns.” This is why the unknown frightens us so much – more than it needs to, more than it was meant to, especially when it comes to knowing ourselves.

When you’re clear that your spiritual self is more sacred to you, you can let go of some of that fear, or at least explore the unknown knowing you can rely on divine order, divine purpose, and on yourself as an integral part of that larger aspect you come from and return to. This also means the energetic frequency you transmit as a result of your expanded Knowing, to others and to Law of Attraction, will create more experiences you desire, as well as allow you to experience all of life and yourself more in the way you desire.

Albert B. Simpson said one of the signs of a spiritual life is enthusiasm. This makes sense. If you feel connected to and in flow with your spiritual self and the spiritual universe, how could you lack enthusiasm, at least a good deal of the time? Trying to appease society or even ego only, can drain or deplete enthusiasm. You can be enthusiastic about what you do in the world, but that feeling is amplified if inspired and supported by enthusiasm that springs naturally from spirituality.

Harmony is meant to exist between the two worlds, but this is to be a result of your spiritual development that allows you to contribute authentically to society, not by you or your spirituality being dictated to by society. Your spiritual self gives you your voice in your life and in the world. It encourages and inspires head-and-heart alignment in decision making. It leads you into integrity.

Through the sacredness revealed through spirituality, we can extend sacredness to the Earth and those we share it with. We open the doorway of the future we desire when we realize and take ownership of our spirituality in the now. Inner guidance is the most profound and effective tool, method, or system you could ever use, especially as the foundation of your Mind and Being. Spirituality is the keeper of these ways.

If you want your experience of both worlds to keep you in a state of appreciation, make your spirituality the world you nurture first, then bring the result of how this influences you into the world. This allows you to make both worlds a sacred experience, in the way this was always meant to be for us.

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce Shafer

Does Guilt about Money Block Receiving It?

Guilt about money or anything (held long past a specific event) blocks you from receiving more of what you desire. Why? It is an opposing thought to what you really want to experience.

People have been looking for, studying, and putting into practice any number of ways to attract more money into their lives (or love, success, etc.). One thing that gets a lot of focus time is the impact of those pesky limiting beliefs, but what about money-related guilt?

Guilt is meant to draw our attention to the fact that what we did or did not do could have been done differently, or not done at all. Then we are supposed to make amends, as needed and if possible, and not repeat what we did, and, hopefully, make better choices as we move forward.

But we hang onto guilt; and quite often, especially in regard to money, we do not realize that although limiting beliefs affect our experiences and results, unrecognized guilt is doing even more to impact us and our results.

Here are some forms of money-related guilt that may be present in your life.

-You connect your self-worth to money. There is self-judgment or guilt about not being and having enough. There are people with bundles of money, or what you would consider satisfactory for you, who still do not feel about themselves they way they desire to. Evidently, self-worth and a bank balance are not reliant on each other. Think about how linking self-worth and money affects Law of Attraction.

-You believe money can or should come to you only one way or only in certain ways. If you’ve had a financially challenging time and someone assisted you, or maybe you had to sell some things, or use reserved funds, this can lead to guilt feelings. Think about how limiting HOW money comes to you applies to Law of Attraction.

-You have a debt problem. Whatever resolution or approach you take about this, you may feel a level of guilt about it. This can lead to all sorts of self-judgment. Think about how this impacts Law of Attraction.

-You feel you misused the money you’ve had. Well, if you feel that way, you likely have a good idea about what not to do anymore. But also ask if it really was misuse or if other beliefs and blocks are causing you to feel and think this way, such as a belief in lack and scarcity that is stronger than your belief in infinite abundance. If you stay attached to the belief that you misused or misuse funds (and in lack and scarcity), think about how this applies to Law of Attraction.

-You feel guilt about having limiting beliefs and how this has affected your life. Think about how this influences Law of Attraction.

Yes, you may feel guilt about one or more of what is listed above or something not listed, and it may be justified; but how long must you carry that? How contrite or guilt-ridden would you have to feel in order to BE and have what you desire? If the Law says what you feel is what you experience more of, then no amount of guilt or any form of negative self-judgment, justified or not, is going to flip results in your favor; or, at least, not as wholly as you would like.

You cannot serve Source, yourself, or others fully if everything you do or attempt is tinged with guilt and self-judgment. You may, indeed, make headway and seem to move forward even with these feelings, but it will likely feel like (and be) a struggle; you may receive money and success, and still feel undeserving; and you may find receipt of money and success is not sustained, much less expands. You cannot feel, speak, act, radiate expansiveness at the same time you feel guilt or self-judgment . . . not about money, not about anything.

One thing is certain about guilt carried long past what caused it: it does not nurture, support, or encourage self-love. If you hold such a grudge against yourself, it is likely you hold similar feelings towards others and even towards your life. Think about how this applies to Law of Attraction.

If you did something wrong, it is in the past, even if you still experience the effects now. The important and necessary focus is: What are you going to do and how will you grow from here?

You are what you practice.
© Joyce Shafer

Do You Focus on the Opposite of What You Desire?

Focusing on the opposite of what you desire is like aiming at a tree rather than at the target then feeling frustrated that you did not hit the bulls-eye. You know, we all do this at times.

How often we say we desire something then put a great many of our thoughts on what is opposite of what will help us achieve, attain, accomplish, allow, or open to receive it more effortlessly.

I wrote receive it more effortlessly because we create quite a struggle for ourselves when our repetitive thoughts and feelings are aimed at what we do not want rather than on what we desire. Ultimately, what we desire (I know this is repetition) is the feeling we expect to have when we have what we desire. We must aim at and hit the desired feeling first so that everything that comes after the feeling connects us with our desired outcome. Understand that as your ultimate desire is a specific feeling, you want to allow leeway in how what you say you want shows up because it may not be exactly what you imagined, but something even better.

Mother Teresa understood this concept (truth) when she said she would not march against war, but would march FOR peace. Esther Hicks said that when you say NO! to something, it is important that you realize this is the same as saying yes to more of it because it is where your attention is more strongly placed. So, what can you or should you do about all those negative, opposite thoughts that enter your mind?

You would make yourself crazy trying to control the tens of thousands of thoughts that pop into your mind each day. Thoughts happen . . . because you are always processing a lot of information, old and new. It is what you choose to do with or about any unsupportive thoughts after they happen that is important. And, how you start your day contributes to how you manage yourself the rest of the day.

A while back I noticed an odd habit each morning once I got moving: my first thoughts of the day were not positive; they were complaints, concerns, fears, and mostly focused on what I did not like or want any more of, often some of the same old stuff morning after morning. All such thoughts were opposite of what I desired. Of course, this got my attention.

I understand how Law of Attraction works, and that what I think leads to what I feel, and what I feel influences my choice of words and actions or non-actions, which influence my results. Understanding these truths is one thing; putting them into practice is another.

Allowing negative thoughts to continue means I choose to focus on the opposite of what I desire: good feelings (feeling enthused about my day and my life) and more positive experiences during the day. Also, best if we are realistic and recognize that you and I are not required to always be in Super Positive Land in order to move forward on desired outcomes. We will enjoy ourselves more if we are, but it is not required in every moment, in order to take action that will lead us to our goals.

Focus on what gets us to our goals IS required (aim at the bulls-eye instead of something to the left or behind you). Part of what leads to negativity and frustration is that we are not hitting our desired goals or hitting them as easily as we would like. Increase your odds of their attainment, move closer to them, and you start to feel lighter and more enthusiastic to go for more.

So, what did I do about my morning tendency toward negativity? I decided to choose my thoughts before I get out of bed each morning. The thoughts I have chosen are ones of appreciation, genuine thankfulness for a new day, new opportunities, new things to learn, and the blessings that I have in my life and those on their way to me. And if a negative thought tries to wiggle its way in, I remind myself of what I truly desire and move into that feeling space (as many times as this takes). Opposing thoughts cannot occupy the same space. One of them has to win. I CHOOSE which one I want to win.

Nor do I try to fool myself into believing I will never have negative thoughts (fears, concerns, criticisms) because I know that is unrealistic, and believing I have to be that way all the time will set me up to self-criticize. Knowing I can shift such thoughts if I choose to is empowering. Actually doing it is personal power in action.

What are some of the ways we focus on the opposite of what is desired?

• This is too difficult vs. How can I make this more effortless?
• I am not happy with my bank balance vs. How can I deeply feel and appreciate the true abundance in my life so I stand in that vibrational frequency, which will open me to ways to improve this and to receive even more abundance?
• I lack what it takes to succeed vs. What can I do to start from where I am and learn and grow?
• I am fearful about (XYZ) vs. What can I do to allow and expand trust in myself and especially in Source?

Do you desire more abundance but constantly go over a mental list of what you feel is lacking in your life, or criticize or envy those who have what you desire?

Do you want a better relationship but consistently focus on what you think is wrong with your partner rather than what you appreciate about him or her?

Do you wish your relationship with your children (or anyone) was better, but more often than not you focus on catching them doing something wrong rather than doing something right?

Do the majority of your thoughts (and actions) lead you to what will help you attain or accomplish your desired outcomes?

Keep in mind that it is not about never having negative thoughts . . . you will; it is about making the choice to refocus yourself when they happen. Do this often enough and it becomes a natural part of you.

You are what you practice.
© Joyce Shafer

What Is the Language of Manifestation?

Oh, for a magic word or phrase that would make this manifestation thing easier! Is there a proper language you can use? Absolutely.

We would appreciate if manifestation of what we truly desire was as easy as uttering (or shouting) Abracadabra! Interestingly, that word is derived from Avra Kehdabra, which means, “I will create as I speak.” You’ve likely heard or read this so many times already: The source field matches, as a manifested experience, what you communicate to it. What deters, alters, or repels what we want is if we don’t use the language properly for the Law of what we would call Desired Manifestations.

Of course, most of us know we speak to ourselves and others in a number of ways: with words, actions, facial expressions, hand gestures, conscious thoughts, subconscious thoughts, and state of mind. Just as we can improve our communication skills we can train ourselves to communicate better or properly with the field of manifestation that Source created for our use.

No matter how many systems about attraction or manifestation you study, to be effective, you must communicate in the right language; and that language is a specific feeling. You can use words to write it or say it, but unless you really FEEL it, you are not communicating it. Not really feeling it is like sending a signal that travels so far then stops before it reaches its destination. You may call this feeling gratitude, appreciation, thankfulness, or something else that matches the specific idea of this; but this is the language that will send what you truly desire into your frame of reference. I say frame of reference because everything you desire is available. It is up to you to believe it is yours to receive and to receive it.

Any feeling opposite of gratitude, appreciation, or thankfulness communicates belief in lack rather than in availability, which causes non-delivery or delivery of less than what you want. This opposite supplies you with exactly what you communicate: I say I want this good thing, but most of my behaviors and thoughts communicate the opposite. By my own ways, I oppose delivery of exactly what I say I want or something even better.

But you know this. So why is it so darn difficult to just do this? You are well-practiced at communicating in negatives and doubt instead of in positives and faith. You are a master of fear, worry, and perceiving and speaking scarcity and lack. The way to build your communication skills and become a master of desired manifestations is to catch yourself when you begin to feel the opposite and remember what works; that the Law works to fulfill what you communicate. Find something, anything, to appreciate. Each night or each morning, make a list of 5 to 10 things you appreciate in your life, and really feel the appreciation. Train yourself to get into the habit of feeling appreciation.

You are conditioned to believe you have to wait for something to show up or change to your liking to feel this, but the truth is you have to feel it first so that something can show up or change to your liking, to match what you feel. The feeling is your heartfelt invitation for what you desire to become your experience. When you feel anything else, it is like not sending an invitation or not opening the door, or more accurately, not accepting the invitation sent to you by Source to receive what you request. This has been repeated by the masters over thousands of years. It has always been a truth, and the only way you can create the shift in your life that you desire is to first create it in you . . . despite appearances. Appearances are the result of what caused them. And any appearance can shift when you reframe how you perceive it.

Yes, clear mental images complete your deliberate communication, but genuine gratitude, appreciation, thankfulness for What Has Been, What Is, and What Can and Will Be starts and completes the conversation. This type of conversation allows you to be at one with Source’s desire to fulfill any request and with the Law of Manifestation. This may be your greatest challenge: to realize this as truth and to live it in trusting faith. It may feel difficult to do this and do this consistently, but you will get better at it with daily practice.

Appreciation shifts you from thinking and feeling opposed to what you want. Appreciation opens you to feel trusting faith, whenever feeling that is a challenge to you at first. Appreciation conveys that you are thankful, and this translates into you allowing more to appreciate to come to you. When you genuinely value what you receive for all it provides or teaches, you receive even more to appreciate . . . because you GET what IT Is All About and what you are truly capable of. A related example is when you send a gift to someone and never receive an expression of appreciation. If this happens repeatedly, you stop sending gifts. In the case of manifestation, you, not Source, are both giver and receiver. Source empowered each of us in this way.

Start from where you are today. Appreciate that Source provides a way for YOU to manifest and that you are aware of how it works. The quote, "Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime," is a good example of what Source created for us: an infinitely abundant manifestation ocean, the tackle (tools) to fish with, and awareness of how to use these tools. Let go of thoughts such as, “I hope I can catch a fish,” or “I never catch any fish,” or even, “I really need a fish,” and hold onto, “I know that all I have to do is drop my line in and in right timing the fish I desire is/are mine.” Note: If you want a bigger fish, you have to use a bigger hook. In manifestation this translates into asking more largely.

Appreciation is an integral part of your asking.

You are what you practice.
© Joyce Shafer

Do You Practice Scarcity Thinking?

Scarcity . . . sounds like what it creates—Scare City—because this kind of thinking keeps you living in fear. Would you like to shift your thoughts about this?

Problem: You lose something you rely on (like steady income from a job, or a relationship). They’re important but are each only one funnel of money or love coming into your life. You’re always connected to Source, which is an infinite funnel of resources, not scarcity—it can create anything. Yes or no? Saying you believe this but not putting it into practice, not allowing it in your life, doesn’t bring you the results you want, does it? Labeling events as “problems” is directly related to scarcity thinking.

Joseph Sugarman said: "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."

Do you see only the “problem” or do you allow there may be and look for and act on opportunities available through the “problem”?

Do more of your thoughts and words support scarcity and lack, or abundance and prosperity—harmony or discord, stress or serenity?

Are you a news addict? Does what you listen to or read lift you into a positive state of mind (creativity, enthusiasm, appreciation, or even relaxation) or drag you down (affirms what’s “awful” in life)? How and what you feed your mind is what you “nurture” and grow in your life.

Scarcity thinking is rampant. Just notice how often scarcity, in its many forms, comes up in conversations. There is no scarcity—not really, just scarcity thinking.

I understand the challenge if you’re having a tough time, but it Can Be Temporary if you look for and move forward on opportunities, and get your thinking straight. Scarcity, lack, and problems may appear but are more often states of mind, and definitely have to be your states of mind before they continue to behave as your reality past when they happen. Instead of “I don’t have,” try “How might I attain”? Think of someone you know who has an abundant life. Is their state of mind scarcity or acting on opportunities?

You can try different strategies, but it’s your thinking that must change first in order to create real and lasting transformation, for any and every area of your life. Old thoughts do not create new results.

You may get caught up in worry, fear, and thoughts of lack—all forms of negative thinking. Even if you don’t pull to you all the experiences that match these thoughts (fortunately!), you manage to experience the emotions as though the experiences were real. That is just NOT fun or healthy. Kurt Wright was correct when he said commitment is a magnet. Scarcity thinking acts as a commitment to have less—and you get it. Choose the thoughts you would want to become your reality the same day you think them, and know that you fuel attainment of your desired results with your Determination to have them.

This kind of thinking takes commitment. Will this be easy to do? Perhaps not at first, if you’ve practiced scarcity thinking for a long time; but it will get easier with practice. Then it will feel more logical to do this than not. Your desired results may or may not be instant, but your right results will be yours if you stay with this. If scarcity thinking hasn’t improved your life so far, maybe it’s time to shift this.

You are what you practice.
© Joyce Shafer

How Is Your Mind Set?

My dictionary defines mind-set as “a fixed mental attitude formed by experience, education, prejudice, etc.” The word “fixed” indicates something can’t or won’t be changed. But you’re more powerful than that.

Mind-set means your thinking mind is set in a certain way. I like the word “set” because it means you place something in a particular spot or way, like when you set a vase on a table. If you can set it, you can set it differently or in another place or direction.

Here’s how I’d re-word the definition of mind-set: a mental attitude inclined in a direction based on what you tell yourself that anything means, which means you can tell yourself anything, depending on how you decide to or prefer to set your mind about anything and everything.

You may believe events and others cause you to feel or think a certain way, but no one but you can set your mind about anything.

But . . . “Some things are real,” you may say.

Many things are what they are—usually because of what leads up to them, but we often tell ourselves way more than what’s actually going on. And then we believe what we tell ourselves . . . and then, because misery loves company, we set out to convince others as well.

Here’s an example. A workshop presenter shared that she had to learn to “fix” her face. When she wore no expression, her mouth’s natural shape was turned down, which made her look as though she was frowning, when she wasn’t. You can imagine the chatter about her that likely included, “She’s always in a bad mood,” when she wasn’t. Once she realized this, she began to practice deliberately shifting the corners of her mouth up just a bit so people wouldn’t judge her as angry or unfriendly. You could say the corners of her mouth are fixed in a downward direction, but she chose to fix this—in order to have different experiences and results. And others had fixed in their minds an opinion of her that was inaccurate.

One of the daily emailed quotes I receive came from The Talmud: “If you add to the truth, you subtract from it.”

If you have a result or experience you don’t like or want, look at the choices or actions that led to it so you know what to shift, and don’t add to it with comments like, “I’m such a (whatever negative you might say about yourself)” or any other version of that about life or others. When you add such criticisms about yourself (or life or others) rather than look at what is and what can be done differently, you diminish the truth of yourself in your mind. You set your mind against your Self. What experiences and results might you expect if you do this?


You can choose to keep an attitude fixed, but that is a choice (remember that clever phrase “hardening of the attitudes”?). I’ve heard people say things like, “I’m too old to change” or “It’s too late to change it now,” and even “That’s how God made me.” What’s between the lines is, “This behavior (or mind-set) meets an immediate need for me. It creates problems for me, but it’s a lot easier for me to repeatedly butt my head against this familiar wall than to risk facing what scares me or admit that my behaviors create some of my problems.”

How is your mind set about these?
● I have to be perfect, OR My significance is inherent and not dependent on being “perfect”.
● Who I am is not enough, OR I’m the only me there is so I enjoy and make the most of it, and expand who I am in the ongoing process of my life.
● Every day is difficult, OR Some things challenge me, but I’ve been meeting and going beyond challenges since God made dirt. If I allowed this to be easier, what would I do differently?
● Money worries are like a shadow I can’t shake, OR Every day I find a way to increase my contribution to others and feel great about the compensation that’s exchanged.
● People with money are to be belittled (and simultaneously envied), Or Having all the money (and even wealth) that supports my life feels right.
● I HAVE to be stressed, OR Sometimes I feel stressed about certain events, but I can decide if they are events I need to take action on, and take it, or whether it’s my thinking about events causing the stress, and shift this.
● I don’t have what it takes to be successful (work, relationships), OR I choose success and nothing less, and allow myself to have it.

When you get into bed to sleep, how is your mind set?
When you wake, how is your mind set?
When you do anything at all, how is your mind set?

You can meditate, affirm, and use all the techniques you know, but if your mind-set is not aligned with what you truly desire, and desire to be and experience, you’re butting your head (and life experience) against a too-familiar wall.

Specific mind-sets create matching experiences and results. How is your mind set?

You are what you practice.
© Joyce Shafer

How Well Do You Cope with Change?

There are two types of change to be aware of—the type you desire and the type you don’t. Do you feel you manage yourself well enough through these?

Do You Want Your Life to Be Different?

If you desire change in some area of your life, the first thing that must change is whatever in you prevents or delays your desired outcome. Inevitably, your desired outcome is to feel the way you wish to feel about whatever it is that has your attention.

What are some ways you prevent or delay desired change?

You don’t allow it or make room for it. You cannot desire something to change and also believe it never will AND expect to see it as your reality. A good mantra for this is, “It COULD happen,” because it could! But it can’t if you don’t allow that it can.

Your thoughts, feelings, and words don’t support the change you desire—only what you don’t like. If you mentally replay and repeatedly say what you don’t like, you’ll never experience what you desire. What you feed is what grows. Whatever you criticize, it’s likely you’re doing the same thing, in some measure, without even realizing it. When you adjust this, you’ll notice the issue shifts, ends, or it no longer bothers you as it once did.

You believe that the outer experience must change BEFORE you have the inner experience you desire. Sorry, but that’s bassakwards according to how reality works. Ask yourself what may need to be adjusted in you, as ultimately, that is where you desire to feel the difference.

Ask yourself if the change requires you end or let go of something. If you’re truly unhappy about, say, your relationship with someone you believe will never change—and you know you cannot continue to live this way—make an exit plan. If a situation is genuinely intolerable, leave it. Just keep in mind the saying, “Wherever you go, there you are.”

Ask if perhaps your perceptions, assumptions, and expectations are off-center. Perceptions and assumptions, more often than not, lack enough information. Expectations are affected by our programmed beliefs and may not allow us to reassess and adjust as needed with a more open, relaxed attitude. This also leads us to burden others to provide what only we can provide to ourselves.

Do you wake every day and deliberately connect with a good feeling or do you immediately enter negative-mode?

Do you take a few moments throughout the day, and especially before you go to sleep, to feel genuine appreciation for the good you experienced during the day and the good you do have in your life, or do you have a gritch session streaming in your mind?

You’re impatient. It’s just not happening fast enough. First, go back through the above list and see which one or ones you’re engaging—and shift this. Everything in life has an incubation time before it’s hatched or born. This may be fast or slow, depending on what’s needed and how you’re managing your energy. When you genuinely trust that your best interests are always fulfilled (and get what that might mean), you release being so concerned about timing because you trust right timing. This is why it’s recommended you envision (with deep feeling) what you truly desire—then release the thought of it, as the tendency is to return to the thought of its non-presence rather than allow it to be yours, in the right timing.

It may be a “bitter pill to swallow,” but you can’t expect desired change until you realize in what way you’re part of the problem—and shift this. This kind of conscious awareness lets you feel more empowered, relaxed, and on purpose. And, isn’t that the point of any desired change?

When Change Happens to You

My iPEC training manual lists four cycles of change: Shuffle, Deal, Play the Game, Toss In.

Shuffle: You’ve faced an ending or know a change is at hand. Healing is needed, emotions run the gamut. It’s time for a new direction and you reassess where you are and explore where you want to go next. It’s scary and perhaps even a bit exciting, depending. You may feel you’ve lost control in some way, but realize new opportunities do exist.

Deal: You came up with a plan, feel optimistic, and begin to take next steps. You test the waters to see how they feel. If all feels good, your confidence builds and so does your commitment.

Play the Game: You are engaged with this new aspect or phase. You still reassess, but if you feel it’s going well, feel successful, you want it to continue. But as in any game, you still face challenges.

Toss In: Every cycle, whether considered a success or not, runs its course and it’s time for an ending or an upgrade. If an ending, you may wonder how you’ll manage to work through the cycle yet again—but you will. Momentum will slow as you enter the Shuffle phase to figure out what’s next.

What’s generally feared about this type of change is the unknown—what’s next and how you’ll handle yourself in the midst of it. Yet, without walking into the unknown from time to time (and every future moment is unknown), we enter stagnation. In time, stagnant waters offer nothing. Allow that some fear of change is natural, but let go of fearing the fear. Draw on your courage. Courage isn’t the absence of fear, but it is proactive. Action sets you free.

You are what you practice.
© 2010, Joyce Shafer

Does a Road Trip Parallel a Life Journey?

Do you ever wonder if you’re on the right road of your life? If this is or has been your experience, how did you manage yourself?

A friend and I took a road trip using her GPS to get us from New York City to Louisiana. We wanted to beat the anticipated July Fourth traffic, so left Thursday evening and drove until we stopped for the night.

The next morning we continued on the interstate highway marked as West. At 1:30 we’d been driving in the beautiful state of Virginia for a while and decided to stop for lunch. Afterwards, we got back in the car and the GPS directed us onto Highway 81 South. We immediately entered a Twilight Zone experience: No evidence of the west highway sign was anywhere and the highway looked completely different. We kept driving, trusting the GPS, though my friend re-entered the destination at each stop we made.

My friend’s boyfriend called and asked where we were.
“We’re on Highway 81 South in Virginia,” she told him.
“Aren’t you supposed to be going west?” he asked.
“I’m following the GPS,” she replied.

He called several times to see where we were, and each time my friend’s answer was the same: “We’re still in Virginia on 81 South,” and he’d exclaim, “You’re still in Virginia?!” He was genuinely concerned we were on the wrong road. My friend and I joked that if we were on the wrong road, all we had to do was go south until we hit Florida, then turn right. Her boyfriend confirmed we were on the right road (from his computer), though we didn’t cross the Virginia state line until 9:30 that night.

During that Virginia segment, we exited 81 South to get gas and refreshments. This exit turned out to be one that doesn’t tell you, until you’re off the highway, that the gas station is a several-mile trip—in our case, three miles back north. The GPS repeatedly said: “Recalculating,” giving directions for how to get back on the highway. My friend was not happy, initially, that we were going “backwards,” but we decided to make a joke of it and to take only exits obviously right off the highway.

Life is similar to a road trip, and we discussed this to some extent as we traveled.

Road Trip: You have a starting point and a destination, with a number of pauses along the way.
Life: You can only start from where you are, and it’s important to have a desired goal so you know where you want to go. For some this is an overall goal; others are better served by the next goal then the next. You may pause along the way to have a certain experience then get back on track.

Road Trip: You use a vehicle.
Life: Your skills, talents, and willingness to learn act as your vehicle to get you where you want to go.

Road Trip: You use an atlas or a GPS for guidance.
Life: You are blessed with intuition or gut feelings (whether you use this or not) and ability to reassess. People who listen to their intuition will tell you it’s always right, whereas ego-based logic is often faulty and not necessarily connected to what’s appropriate for you.

Road Trip: You need to periodically refuel your vehicle and yourself.
Life: You must feed your body and mind in ways that help you maintain momentum and fulfillment. You must rest to recharge.

Road Trip: You need to periodically visit a restroom and toss out any trash that accumulates.
Life: You have to eliminate what is no longer needed or no longer serves you (or never did) and keep your body, mind, emotions, spirit, and environment as uncluttered as you can so your journey is more comfortable. No one is at their best with a cluttered life.

Road Trip: Traveling with the right companion(s) makes any journey better.
Life: Appropriate others matter. We all need others, and we can accomplish far more when we connect with people who are heading in the same direction we are.

Road Trip: Take appropriate exits so you avoid back-tracking, which adds miles and time to your travels (though, you can turn this experience in your favor).
Life: You have a choice, and using your intuition will guide you. If you find you take a detour from your path and purpose, you can always get back on the right road.

Road Trip: Some roads are longer than you thought they would or should be.
Life: Relax and trust that any and every path you travel has a purpose and is therefore a “right” road for you—if you make it so. You want to keep this in mind, particularly when a progress segment seems to take longer than you or others think it should.

Road Trip: Find the positives and the humor. In our case we had perfect weather, light traffic for a major holiday weekend, and gorgeous scenery. We made light of whatever came up and found reasons to laugh.
Life: Use positive statements to support yourself along the way. Laugh rather than take so much too seriously. Appreciate what you see and discover. Our egos tend to get anxious when we find ourselves in unfamiliar territory. Tune in to the explorer and adventurer inside you.

My friend and I agreed to create a code to use whenever we feel unsure about our personal journeys: “I’m on 81 South.” (Everything seems unfamiliar. I’m not certain this is the right road; and this segment seems to be taking longer than anticipated.)

Despite appearances and opinions, it was the road that got us where we were going. Keep this in mind when you feel you’re on your true path and others doubt or question that you know what you’re doing. Reassess your true direction as needed.

You are what you practice.
© 2010, Joyce Shafer