How Spiritual Practice Works Best

Spiritual practice is something we fine tune as we go along in life. We learn what works and what doesn’t. But there are a few aspects that we must always be consistent about in our practice.

Ernest Holmes said in The Science of Mind that “Perfect belief is the beginning and the end of all good mental work.” Makes sense to me, but that can be tricky to achieve. Perfect belief, of course, means the absence of doubt. Perfect belief and doubt cannot exist in the same space or they’ll cancel each other out. Perfect belief results in perfect practice. Perfect belief and practice are what most of us aspire to build up to. How can we do that?

Holmes offered something about that as well, and these are the aspects that must be consistently practiced. “We should work, not with anxiety but with expectancy; not by coercion but with conviction; not through compulsion but in a state of conscious recognition and receptivity….obstruction is the result of a ‘hang-over’ of belief from past years…”

We should work our spiritual practice not with anxiety but with expectancy. Well, we get the part about anxiety. Anxiety never attracts more of what we desire, but only what matches our feeling-based thoughts swirling around in that emotion. Anxiety may happen before our spiritual practice, but when it happens during and after our practice, it’s a clear indication that doubt is stronger than faith, at least temporarily. But what about the expectancy aspect? What are we supposed to expect? We are, first, to expect the Law to work as it’s designed to, which means to align with and match what we feel, rather than solely what we say we want. It’s up to us to remove any knots in that thread. And, we are to understand that what we want cannot contradict the highest good, or it won’t be fulfilled. So even though we can and are meant to make a specific request, the safest thing to ask for and expect is for our highest good and the highest good of all involved to be fulfilled. Then we need to trust that.

We should work our spiritual practice not with coercion but with conviction. Well, you can’t actually coerce the Law of Attraction (Manifestation). That’s not how it works, but we sure do give it a go fairly often. We end up roiling our own energy when we do that. Conviction isn’t that easy either, because again we’re back at facing the fact that any doubt we have is stronger than our trust in Source’s ability to provide the highest good for all involved. But a belief in the Truth of how the Law is set up to work with us and for us, that level of conviction, puts us in harmony with the Universe and in flow.

We should work our spiritual practice not through compulsion but in a state of conscious recognition and receptivity. How often, especially when stressed, do we then get “serious” about our practice? We then become like the wolf in the childhood story of the three little pig—we huff and we puff and we try to blow the undesired whatever from our life through affirmations and so on. A calmer way is to practice conscious recognition about cause and effect. There’s a great deal of discussion about this, but for the purpose of this conversation, let’s say that sometimes the effect we experience is directly caused by us through our feelings, thoughts, words, or actions. Then there are times when “shift” happens and we cannot find a way to point the finger in our direction. At those times, we need to realize it is now up to us to get directly involved with cause and effect from that moment on and find something we can align our thoughts and feelings with that leads us out of darkness and into light. And at that point in time, we must become receptive to what’s presented to us, for us, and through us and go from there.

Obstruction is the result of a “hang-over” of belief from past years. What an effective mental image those words create of something we all experience. Beliefs and practices of the past that never served us well but are still carried by us certainly feel like a hangover. We don’t perform at or feel our best. We struggle to be clear and articulate in our moments and overall life. If you’ve never had a hangover, you won’t understand how the person doesn’t function at full capacity or how long it takes for the person to feel like himself again. The more we let go of beliefs from the past that never served us or no long do the healthier and stronger we feel. Plus, the more we then open up to what we’re truly capable of feeling and accomplishing.

How we practice life and our spirituality do more than overlap, they are one and the same. This time, instead of focusing solely on the spiritual practice when you now reread the key part of Holmes’ quote, focus on these words as a practice for life as well: “We should work, not with anxiety but with expectancy; not by coercion but with conviction; not through compulsion but in a state of conscious recognition and receptivity.” It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.   

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

You are welcome to use this article in your newsletter or on your blog/website as long as you use my complete bio with it.

Joyce L. Shafer is a Life Empowerment Coach dedicated to helping people feel, be, and live their true inner power. She’s author of “I Don’t Want to be Your Guru, But I Have Something to Say” and other books/e-books, and publishes a free weekly online newsletter that offers empowering articles. See all that’s offered by Joyce and on her site at http://stateofappreciation.weebly.com

How to Succeed AT Life

We all think we know what success is. There are certainly enough definitions of it and opinions about how to succeed IN life. But, how can we truly succeed AT life?

We can succeed AT life by being true to ourselves. It’s not always as simple or easy to do this as we might imagine or wish; but maybe that’s already been your experience. For one thing, as we move through our life, we have a trail of expectations following us, those expectations imposed on us by others, and those we erroneously impose on ourselves. We walk in a wake of negativity as a result, because we don’t know how or feel confident enough to be true to ourselves after years of others’ influences swarming around us, attempting to tell us what to think, feel, say, and do.

Ernest Holmes wrote an interesting passage about negativity in his book, The Science of Mind. But it was what came at the end of that passage that got me thinking. Here it is: “Thought which is built upon a realization of the Divine Presence has the power to neutralize negative thought, to erase it, just as light has the power to overcome darkness; not by combating darkness, but by being exactly what it is: LIGHT.”

Light overcomes darkness “not by combating darkness, but by being exactly what it is: LIGHT.” What happens when we are not our true selves or true to ourselves is we engage in an inner battle, though we may also battle with others who, for their own reasons, attempt to deter us from being true to ourselves. With so much focus on battles, little energy is given to the real matter: being ourselves and evolving in the way and timing appropriate and fulfilling for us. You cannot live YOUR purpose (much less your life) if you’re living according to someone else’s expectations that you are not in alignment with.

Anthropologist Margaret Mead had a particular mindset when her daughter was born. She said she couldn’t wait to see who this person was. She didn’t say she couldn’t wait to mold her daughter into who she wanted the girl to become. Big difference. Most of us did not have the benefit of such refreshing open-mindedness in the environment where we grew, learned, and developed. We were not, in general, provided with a nurturing space to discover and determine who we are, so much as we were told, by so many, who we were expected to become. How often we see others (or have it as our own experience) who follow the wishes or expectations of one or more others, rather than follow what’s in their heart and spirit. It’s not a pretty picture when that happens.

One example comes to mind of someone I know who wanted to be a musician but his parents wanted him to be a doctor. So he slogged through all the years needed to put M.D. behind his name. Yes, he learned useful things, but he had no passion for his practice. A sad, serious side-effect was that he lost compassion for his patients. He did what was expected of him, barely. And, he was miserable. He turned to drugs and other not-in-balance practices to buffer him from the negativity and restriction he felt he couldn’t escape. Whether or not he would have become a professional musician is not the point. What might have happened had he not succumbed to his parents’ expectations? We’ll never know. But there is a chance that he may have found his way to a life that fulfills him, rather than one he has to numb himself against.

In that and similar situations, one result is clear: Everyone whose life is touched in any way by someone not being true to themselves becomes, in some measure, a hostage to expectations and outcomes; and the effects and outcomes don’t cease after the first time this happens. An ongoing ripple effect is created. Many would look at that man’s life and see only that he’s a doctor, with a doctor’s income and what it allows him to buy and get away with, and call him a success. Now that you know some of the real story, you may hesitate to assign that label to him.

How much of the negativity we experience is a result of not being true to ourselves? Think about the implications of that for a moment. What are you doing and who are you doing it for? If your why is one you have head and heart alignment with, no problem. If you don’t have that alignment, you have negative thoughts buzzing like bees in your mental, emotional, and spiritual life, which, of course, can affect your physical body. It definitely affects your energy and what you attract into your life as your experience, as well as how you relate to yourself, others, and your life. The proverbial vicious circle gets created.

Whatever you’ve been indoctrinated or convinced to believe about success, the truth is that real success is an inner experience—a feeling. When you find what makes you happy and fulfilled in ways appropriate for you, and this in turn, causes you to spread some good into your circle or world, you are a success. Maybe you have enough material things in your life that causes others to call you a success and maybe you don’t. Should their opinions matter? Do you really want them to? Or do you want to put the measure of success where it belongs—in your hands? It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate. 

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

You are welcome to use this article in your newsletter or on your blog/website as long as you use my complete bio with it.

Joyce L. Shafer is a Life Empowerment Coach dedicated to helping people feel, be, and live their true inner power. She’s author of “I Don’t Want to be Your Guru, But I Have Something to Say” and other books/e-books, and publishes a free weekly online newsletter that offers empowering articles. See all that’s offered by Joyce and on her site at http://stateofappreciation.weebly.com

What Fears Are You Willing to Let Go Of?

It’s a new year. Do you really want to carry all the same fears you had in the last year into this one? Which ones can you let go of that you will let go of?

There’s nothing like getting ready to write an article like this one then having to live its message before you write the first word. Talk about making sure you don’t wax profoundly (one hopes), as though immune or above it all. That’s exactly what happened to me when something I relied on had a significant delay that affected me in a number of ways. You can bet my fears went into overdrive. And right in front of me, which I conveniently, repeatedly ignored, was a sheet of paper with the words that came to me late at night several weeks back: Fear is never the path to walk. Yep. And as many of us know, that is sometimes easier said than done.

While this article simmered on the back burner over the holidays, a quote from Abraham Lincoln, one familiar to most of us, made me look at this topic of fear a bit differently: “A house divided against itself cannot stand.” That’s exactly what fear does—it divides us, in some way, within ourselves, and we feel our world or some part of it is crumbling or at least trembling precariously in some measure. We don’t, and life doesn’t, feel stable at such times.

Fear divides us in global and local ways, but I want to focus on the personal ways it does this to us. When we’re afraid, it’s pretty darn difficult to feel whole, empowered, in flow—connected to all the good in the Universe. It’s difficult, if not impossible—depending on the circumstance—to remember that We Never Walk Alone. Source is always with us. Our Spirit self is always with us. But when our fearful emotions have us in upheaval, this Truth is not something we tend to remember, at least, not right away. It may take awhile. And in the meantime, we feel divided within ourselves and likely feel divided with one or more aspects of our physical, material, and even spiritual life.

Ernest Holmes wrote in The Science of Mind: “To hold one’s thought steadfastly to the constructive, to that which endures, and to the Truth, may not be easy in a rapidly changing world, but to the one who makes the attempt much is guaranteed.” This also applies to a rapidly changing life, but I like that Holmes doesn’t say to the one who does it perfectly, but instead says attempts.

Ultimately, experiences that rattle us demonstrate how much we’ve integrated spiritual realizations, or haven’t as yet, as well as what we still practice that’s opposite of Truth. But what Holmes said is what it’s about, isn’t it—making the effort just as soon as we remember to do this. Our efforts demonstrate intention and commitment to us and to the Universe, and this DOES matter and count in our favor.

What Truths do you absolutely hold steadfast to belief-wise, but still get rattled about when something doesn’t go the way you believe it should or you wish it would—and you find yourself in a state of fear? It’s a good idea to take a moment and write down a few of them. Look at the fears you practice—the “common” ones that make you feel god-awful when you feel them, even though you absolutely believe something else. The fears you’ve been trying to overcome for such a long time. What Truths do they conflict with? What are the fears really about?

Ernest Holmes said something that relates to this: “In the Subjective Mind of man, we find a law obeying his word, the servant of his spirit. Suggestion has proved that the subconscious mind acts upon our thoughts. It is the mental law of our being, and the creative factor within us…. It is enough to say that within us is a mental law, working out the will and purposes of our conscious thoughts…. And what we call our subjective mind is really the use we are making of the One Law… And each is drawing from Life what he thinks into It! To learn how to think is to learn how to live…” (Bolding is mine.)

What this means is something most of us already know: It doesn’t matter what we say we think; what matters is what we really feel and what this feeling leads us to practice, especially subconsciously. What we really feel lives in the subjective, subconscious part of our mind. It’s the undercurrent that moves beneath our conscious thoughts.

For example, you may say that in this new year you’re going to step into your greatness. But if your subjective (subconscious) thought—your personal use of mental law—conflicts with this in any way, you’ll deal with the same fears you’ve always dealt with. (This is to get your attention so that you find a way to free yourself from these thoughts.) For this example or any other, you have to ask yourself some good questions that lead you to your right answers—answers that will allow you to shift your subjective thoughts about whatever has you tied in knots so you loosen or free yourself from that particular tether. However, it’s important to remember that this applies to our personal spiritual path. We cannot intrude on another’s spiritual path, as much as we’d like to—as much as we’d like to ease the fears and pain we sometimes feel as a result of being a witness to their path.

Just a bit more from Holmes about this, because it’s important to keep in mind: “…we all use the creative power of the Universal Mind every time we use our own mind…. The conscious mind is superior to the subjective and may consciously use it…. The conscious mind is Spirit, the subjective mind is Law.” We CAN consciously do what it takes to override opposing beliefs stored in the subjective mind, until the new beliefs about Truth replace the old. In this way, we train ourselves to a new, improved practice. (Bolding is mine.)

Whatever you say you believe but don’t as yet practice as a Truth is something you want to look at, something you want to shift so you don’t carry all of the same old fears with you into this new year. You can pay attention to how some of those fears you’ve carried for years divide you in your inner “house” so you can make a conscious choice about what to do with them. Please note: I’m not talking about the fears that help keep you alive; I’m talking about the fears that keep you from living a fulfilling life. This is a very personal journey each of us must make for ourselves. And… It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

You are welcome to use this article in your newsletter or on your blog/website as long as you use my complete bio with it.

Joyce L. Shafer is a Life Empowerment Coach dedicated to helping people feel, be, and live their true inner power. She’s author of “I Don’t Want to be Your Guru, But I Have Something to Say” and other books/e-books, and publishes a free weekly online newsletter that offers empowering articles. See all that’s offered by Joyce and on her site at http://stateofappreciation.weebly.com

What Does Being In Flow Really Mean?

“Get into the flow” has been a catchy phrase for several decades. We think we know what it means: good stuff happens, right? Is that all it’s about?

If you’ve ever been aware that you were in flow, you know how good that feels. We’re actually always in the flow, but the fact is we don’t always feel it or, rather, we’re not always aware of it. The “flow” is a stream of consciousness and energy that is always in motion, always evolving. It’s the All That Is that we are part of. We’re in the stream at all times, but it can feel as though we aren’t. Why is that? Since we’re always in the stream, we can only feel or believe that we aren’t, which means any perceived separation from the stream is just that: a perception, not a Truth. So, to be in flow is often, but not always, a conscious choice, and to be out of flow is always a subconscious choice (who would consciously choose to be out of the flow?). Whichever our choice, it then becomes our state of being and an experience.

I was contemplating what it means to be in flow and these words came to me: “You have to trust, to be in flow; and to be in flow, you have to trust.” The words clarified the process I’ve experienced: Each requires and results in the other. When you trust Source to act in your behalf and trust that all your needs are always and in all ways met, you’re in flow. When you’re in flow, you trust that Source always and in all ways meets your needs and acts in your behalf. And that trust leads you to feel serene, open, and receptive. But, of course, there’s more to this—there always is.

There are aspects of being in flow. One aspect is non-resistance to what-is. This doesn’t mean you have to like or “want” what-is; you just have to release your resistance about it. This includes anger, frustration, self-doubt, and trying to force your will on others and or the situation. Non-resistance does not mean you allow improper behavior or abuse or don’t do what you need to do to affect improvement. Non-resistance means that rather than wallowing in negativity, you find a way to get your awareness back in alignment with trust in Source, which puts you back into the flow so that right solutions come to you and or happen for you. Again, there is more to understand about this, which I’ll get to. Just know that release of resistance is a key that opens a door to a magical realm within you and in your life.

During one of my morning meditations, I looked at something I’d been saying: “It is Truth that my abundance, prosperity, and well-being are always and in all ways supplied by Source.” A realization caused me to adjust that statement to “It is Truth that my abundance, prosperity, and well-being are Source.” Many of us, despite what we know or practice, still tend to perceive Source as something separate from us, and that our abundance, prosperity, and well-being are also separate from us. But, this is not so. There is only Source. Everything in existence is Source. We are individualized expressions of Source. Just as we are always in the stream, everything and everyone we interact with is Source, which includes us. This is something to wrap your mind and understanding around. It may take a while.

Maybe you know how to get yourself—your awareness—into the flow and maybe you don’t. Maybe you’d like some tips on how to do this quicker and easier. There are some things to consider about this first, because the things to consider are also tips.

For example, what about when you ask or pray for something? Do you feel in flow at such times, or do you feel outside of it? One way to get into flow at such times is to understand that the ultimate prayer or request and the ultimate answer are the same, or should be—if you truly desire to be in flow: “Thank you for always and in all ways acting in and for my highest good and the highest good of all involved, and always in right timing.” For you to be fully on board with this and trust it, as your own practice, there’s something you need to understand: sometimes the answer may feel like it’s anything but the answer, until the moment you realize it is.

One personal example is this: I had a serious, debilitating experience going on for me and nothing I tried worked to shift it. After struggling with this for a Very Long Time, I finally realized I was addressing the situation through resistance, even though I believed I was trying to be constructive and productive in my attempts to affect a solution or resolution, also known as trying to control everything and everyone involved so I could feel better. So I said, “Source, I’m leaving my ego’s need to fix this the way it wants it fixed out of this and I’m turning this matter over to you, because, frankly, I don’t know what the hell to do about it. I trust you to act in and for my highest good and the highest good of all involved.” And, I meant it. I was flat-out frustrated, and I knew frustration was not the path that would get me where I wanted to be.

Well, a lot of shift had to hit the fan first. And, yes, there were many moments (days during a several-month period) when I was anything but serene. Then something happened: What was needed showed up, or, rather, unfolded, in its right timing. I soon realized how everything that had happened had been necessary, and how utterly brilliant it all was. There was no way I could ever have accomplished the inner and outer outcome on my own, and I really mean that. The design plan was flawless. Only a consciousness that had all the information could accomplish that outcome. What was needed was provided, even if it felt at times like I was in hell or at least purgatory while getting there. 

I realize that not everyone thinks about these things the same way I do. For some, they perceive only what they see and never go deeper. I see beyond what appears evident (eventually, and because I look for it because I KNOW it’s there): I see the cosmic tapestry where all the threads contribute to the bigger picture, if you will. And sometimes what I perceive about events could or would make some people feel uncomfortable or even angry and absolutely ready to dispute my interpretation.

An example of this is a friend who had to say goodbye to her elderly, failing, beloved dog. That’s a heartache that only someone who’s been there can empathize with. About a year later, she and her husband had their first child, and the child, it turned out, was allergic to dogs. As painful as losing her dog had been, imagine the heartache that would have happened had she been forced to face the situation that could have arisen. Every living thing has its time and purpose. And, there is a higher-level communication between all things that is going on at all times that we are not consciously aware of, until we see the evidence of it, if we use our “eyes” to see it with. This kind of awareness is another form of being in flow, as are moments of intuition.

Another form of being in the flow is to realize the truth that “No man is an island.” Just as we often perceive Source and our good, our resources, as outside of us, we can also perceive ourselves and our resources as separate from others. The no-separation Truth ties in with another statement I make during my morning meditation: “Thank you for my ongoing unlimited increase in Mind, Wisdom, Mindfulness, Intuition, Serenity, Money, Energy, Creativity, Spiritual Realization, Well-Being, and (something private to me that also serves others as well as me).”

Each of the aspects I listed are obviously good things to have and experience, and perhaps you can see why anyone would want them to be part of their being and life. But one morning, the realization came to me that not only do these things serve and benefit me, but that they also allow me to serve and benefit others in ways appropriate for them and for me—and are meant to do so. No man is an island—ever—except in his own mind and or heart.

Suddenly, my statement had an entirely new texture and I had an entirely new understanding and feeling (realization) within me. To be in flow means we have to realize that it’s not a one-way street that flows into our life and stops there. This may seem obvious, but is it really integrated as your understanding and way of thinking, feeling, and being? Whatever we desire or need and receive and have is meant to flow to us, for us, and through us in some way, at some time, and in some measure. That awareness, that consciousness, that realization is another form of being in flow.

If you’ve had any level of struggle in your life, it’s possible that your primary focus has been on receiving; and you may have felt that as soon as you have extra to give or share, you’ll give or share it. Apply my list to this, as though it were your own, and see what comes up for you. Here’s the list again: ongoing unlimited increase in Mind, Wisdom, Mindfulness, Intuition, Serenity, Money, Energy, Creativity, Spiritual Realization, and Well-Being. Can you feel the benefit to you and to others, if these are your experiences? Can you perceive how life is richer for all involved when they overlap?

In times of struggle, appreciation is definitely a form of putting yourself back into the flow. Say money is a bit tight, but there are things you need to take care of that require money. Maybe a lump sum shows up for you or maybe various amounts show up at different times, and what you experience is each need being able to be met at the right time—maybe not ahead of time, as your ego aspect would prefer, but in the right timing. Any moment when you can genuinely appreciate how this is working out for you is a moment that puts you—through your awareness—back into the flow.

Being in the flow, where you receive what it is you desire and need is wonderful. But being in the flow where you understand the greater give-and-receive loop that feels so good is even better. It’s a higher level of being in flow. When we practice being in the flow, we truly do not have to seek what we need and want, it comes to us in expected, unexpected, and wonderful ways, and often with a promptness that is astonishing, as Dr. Ernest C. Wilson stated. It’s the ultimate way to work smarter, not harder. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

You are welcome to use this article in your newsletter or on your blog/website as long as you use my complete bio with it.

Joyce L. Shafer is a Life Empowerment Coach dedicated to helping people feel, be, and live their true inner power. She’s author of “I Don’t Want to be Your Guru, But I Have Something to Say” and other books/e-books, and publishes a free weekly online newsletter that offers empowering articles. See all that’s offered by Joyce and on her site at http://stateofappreciation.weebly.com

What Am I Meant to Do in This Life?

Life Purpose: It’s a topic on the minds of many. It’s a question (and an industry) that’s like the siren’s song, luring us into its depths. What is this yearning really about?

I don’t think the question of life purpose is as deep as we make it out to be. I think what drives the question, frustrates, and confuses us about this is more about how we want to feel about ourselves than anything else, but we seem to miss that target more than we aim at and hit it. I think this is because we don’t know that it’s a real and worthy target. Nor do we want to feel guilty about or uncomfortable with our choices regarding this matter. Often, we convince ourselves there’s only One Right Choice, which scares the hell out of us. This choice isn’t supposed to be like choosing the red pill or the blue pill in The Matrix movie.

What led me to this topic was a thought process I was entertaining myself with, wondering why some people are more compelled to explore and move toward and into spiritual realization and some are more compelled toward financial and assets gain (legally or illegally attained), with little to no focus on spirituality. Is one path better or more valid than the other? I don’t have the wisdom of Source, so won’t even attempt to answer that question. In fact, it may be a useless question, like “why” often is. However, I have some thoughts about this that I’m comfortable sharing.

We know that one of the Universal Laws is Polarity. This means that everything has a duality about it, has its pair of opposites that are identical in nature but different in degree (e.g., hot and cold are polarities of temperature). The Law of Polarity is a mutable law, which means whatever goes on can be transcended. For example, there are positive and negative thoughts, but both are thoughts, and either of them can be shifted. If things are not going well, you can shift your thoughts so that you aren’t overwhelmed by your negative thoughts and can affirm Truths that lift you up. If things are going well, you can sabotage yourself with negative thinking. Polarity keeps momentum going so that stagnation doesn’t occur. We are meant to be stimulated into inner and or outer action by the polarities we experience.

Back to life purpose or what we’re meant to do in this life. What if your driving question is how to attain more money and stuff, and the spirituality aspect takes a backseat or isn’t even in the car? It’s possible you’re attuned to having a primarily physical-material experience in this lifetime—for your own soul’s purposes, whatever they may be. If this is your path, this driving force in your life is but a line on the abundance-prosperity polarity graph. Maybe it’s extreme for you and you must become or do become a millionaire or billionaire. Maybe it’s moderate. Maybe it’s low, at the other end of the spectrum. Perhaps along the way, or in your more mature years, your spiritual aspect quietly nudges you to ask how you, in your physical-material mindset, can contribute to your life and the lives of others, and how you (and maybe others) can evolve as a result. After all, you could be a generous, caring billionaire who does numerous large and small truly good works from the heart, and never consciously or deliberately entertain a spirituality-related thought in this lifetime.

What if your driving question is about how you can contribute to your life and the lives of others as well as have a deeply spiritual experience in a physical-material environment? This may lead you to shift back and forth between figuring out how to exist and evolve in both, for your own soul’s purposes. You may find yourself on the extreme end of this measuring stick and be the person who meditates in a cave and relies on others to bring food, water, and other supplies to you. Or you may feel that trying to do both materiality and spirituality creates contradictions within you—because you question the importance of doing what helps sustain you and your life versus pursuing or attaining spiritual realization. Your question about this may block the balance you can experience so that you have all you need in both areas. We see it all the time: the spirituality-based person who struggles to sustain his or her life. Not only is their struggle an inner one, but an outer one as well: there are people who question why such people charge for their services, and believe the services should be free or nominal because they are spiritual in nature. However, no one argues about fees with a plumber when they need one.

You might assess the two “paths” above as polarities, but both contribute to our unified experiences of life. We cannot all sit in caves, figuratively and or literally speaking. We cannot all focus solely on tangible and financial assets. Both materiality and spirituality are needed for life to flourish. Whichever one of these polarity paths you fit into at this time, we are all meant to process experiences and evolve in some measure as a result of them.

It’s up to each of us to figure out how we will express ourselves while here. And this may be in one way or a number of ways. But it is about what we enjoy, what we are good at, what we are interested in, short-term and or long-term, and what and how we contribute to a few or the many. And what we contribute may be in some large or grand way or through numerous small kindnesses that ripple outward in a returns-to-you and a pay-it-forward sort of way.

I’ve had a number of incarnations in this lifetime. I started out as a singer, winning awards and scholarships, and training for the opera. Then amid other make-a-living-based and life experiences, I became an artist in three mediums and did 600 pieces of art in 5 years. There were gallery showings with awards and where all my art sold, individual and corporate commissions, retail shops with sales, and a few individuals who collected my work. Then I got into writing and editing, with a stretch as a life empowerment coach thrown into the middle of this. These days, I balance my place in that second description above (physical-spiritual) by writing my weekly articles—like the one you’re reading now—and include them in my weekly newsletter that also highlights the spirituality-based works of guest experts each week. But the other thing I do, which helps sustain my life and my passion for words and the tapestries they weave, is services for writers, especially new writers. This work drives my bus! Simultaneous to this, I’m always increasing, expanding, and evolving my spiritual solidity and spiritual realization, which also drives my bus. I no longer question which one is to have more importance (I used to do that). I’ve landed in the flowering field of whole-beingness: Everything I do contributes something, in some way, to me and to others. I grasp the importance of both materiality and spirituality for this experience I’m having, just as one coin has two sides. I’ve become keenly aware that I cannot do one without affecting or influencing the other.

I share some of my own story so you can see that you can follow your path in your own way. You are meant to. Your path can lead you until the moment you’re ready to lead yourself and choose what it is you wish to do that fulfills you on all levels or on as many levels as possible for the moment or for a lifetime. What you are meant to do is find your bliss, as Joseph Campbell said. Only you know or can determine what that is. And it may not be in one way only. What you’re meant to do—your life purpose—is a feeling, not an action or a thing or a person. Find your feeling. It’s your song, your dance, your life. And it will influence whatever you choose to do and how you choose to express it.

One line of dialogue said by Professor Dumbledore to Harry Potter that always speaks to me is this: “It is not our abilities that show who we are, but our choices.” You can have stellar skills, talents, and abilities and waste them or be too afraid to explore and demonstrate them for your benefit and or the benefit of others. You can be great at what you do and also be an assoholic. You can do one thing or a number of things well that provides enough income to keep you surviving or thriving and also be a person others love, respect, trust, rely on, and want the company of. You can show people what you can do and you can show people who you are. Your choices will do that by default, anyway.

Rather than wondering so much about what you should be doing or showing others what you can do so you earn approval, focus more on who you want to be and show yourself, as well as others, who you really are. And if you make or have made choices you wish you hadn’t or regret, forgive yourself; decide to choose a better way if ever faced with a similar choice. You always have the choice to do and be better.

Stephen Covey said, "But until a person can say deeply and honestly, “I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday,” that person cannot say, "I choose otherwise." What we are meant to do in this life is makes choices, preferably conscious ones rather than reactive ones; though, we usually (hopefully) realize at some point that this is part of our path we are here to travel. We can makes choices that support us or seemingly don’t. I say seemingly don’t, because sometimes you get where you’re going by traveling a back road rather than a superhighway. We can make choices that contribute to one or many others, or choices that detract. Choose to contribute in ways appropriate for you and for others. Sometimes what this means to you requires you to figure it out for yourself, but it’s a terrific form of GPS for a more satisfying life.

Choices are stepping stones on our path of experiences. The ones we choose to step on determine our destination. Whatever we choose, we live with the consequences or desired results of our choices. You might say that what you are meant to do is choose who you wish to be and be who you are meant to be, for your own purposes and based on how you intend to feel about yourself and your life, so that you align your choices with that. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.                   

          

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

You are welcome to use this article in your newsletter or on your blog/website as long as you use my complete bio with it.

Joyce L. Shafer is a Life Empowerment Coach dedicated to helping people feel, be, and live their true inner power. She’s author of “I Don’t Want to be Your Guru, But I Have Something to Say” and other books/e-books, and publishes a free weekly online newsletter that offers empowering articles. See all that’s offered by Joyce and on her site at http://stateofappreciation.weebly.com

What to Do When Affirmations Don’t Cut It

Sometimes affirmations seem like the best thing to do, and then they don’t. Nor do they always quiet that annoying negative voice in the mind; but there’s something that does.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I get really excited about one or more new affirmations. This is usually when my energy connection to Source hasn’t been supported by me as fully as it might have been and I’m feeling low or skittish or truly out of balance. I’ll work with the affirmations that make me feel better—for a while—then I notice I begin to alter the wording. This is natural and should be expected: we all start somewhere then progress from there, so of course the wording that worked at the beginning may need to be adjusted as we move forward and evolve.

However, I may also reach the point where doing the affirmations may start to feel as though I’m trying to convince myself they’re true in my life, or that I’m asking Source for what the affirmation affirms and that my asking is tinged with worry and doubt. Energetic hiccups happen when I attempt to say an affirmation I don’t absolutely resonate with or believe as 100% true in my own regard; not in regard to Source, of course.

I recently felt such awareness regarding the affirmations I was using each morning from Catherine Ponder’s book, The Secret of Unlimited Prosperity. They were all good statements that apply to many life areas, but even at the start, I had to alter some of the words so they worked for me. I still highly recommend the book, for lots of reasons; but I reached a personal realization and had to do something about it.

There is one particular thing she wrote that always gets and holds my attention: “Realization precedes manifestation. A realization of Truth will banish every ill, and the prayer through which realization comes is the prayer that asserts the truth.” My dictionary defines realize as, among other definitions: to make real; to understand fully. This made me look at that first sentence in a certain way. A realization can be a thought belief (to make real in the mind, even if it isn’t) or true faith (to fully understand, know), and the two are not the same thing, to my way of thinking.

Realization precedes manifestation. Thoughts create experiences. How often it has been my experience to either believe something (a thought I have, which may not be in my best interest, and may change) or to have faith (the absence of doubt, a constant belief upheld by evidence) and experience what it was I believed or had faith about. I know: it’s basic Law of Attraction.

When I recently noticed that I felt doubt about some of the affirmations, even with my own rewording, I decided the best way for me to have a beneficial experience was to use only those statements I could get 100% on board with, ones that did not cause that little voice in my head to say, “Un unh.” I call these Truth statements—statements I absolutely believe are true and have absolute faith in as Truth. I’m going to share some of them with you, and you can see if they resonate within you as they do within me. The statements are modified versions from Ponder’s book.

My Truth Statements

It is Truth that the One Source of Infinite Love is the source of all supply, including my supply. Reason this feels true: I do believe there is only one primary Source, so it makes sense that everything and everyone comes from that Source, is an expression of that Source, returns to that Source from which it or they came. This is also supported by metaphysicists and quantum physics, which finally, in premise, agree, even if they use different terminology.

It is Truth that the One Source of Infinite Love is always and in all ways opening and providing new channels of abundance, prosperity, and well-being to me, for me, and through me. Reason this feels true: I experience this, when I’m in flow. And, it also makes me feel quite good to support receiving and sharing as part of the larger dynamic of my experience—a grand abundance, prosperity, and well-being loop.

It is Truth that there is no numbering of the avenues through which supply may come to me; that my resource is as far-reaching as the universe. Reason this feels true: I believe that Source is unlimited. I more than believe this; I’ve experienced it on many occasions. Only human thought limits what we believe our supply and resources are. This statement also supports my connection with life.

It is Truth that I am meant to expect my supply through all avenues of contact with life. Reason this feels true: It has been said repeatedly that Source has already provided everything we ever need or ever could, and that only our resistance to receiving it, in some way, prevents it or holds it back from coming to us. Yes, this is one that is a larger conversation I won’t get into now, but we are not meant to not expect that our needs and desires are to be supplied during our life. (It’s not about what I can get from the flow, but that I get into the flow.)

It is Truth that my abundance, prosperity, and well-being are from Source; and that my abundance, prosperity, and well-being are always and in all ways omnipresent. Reason this feels true: I do believe the first part of that statement. And because I believe it and experience it as Truth, the second part of that statement must automatically be Truth, as well, because I believe Source is omnipresent.

It is Truth that appreciation is a magnet for all good things of the universe to hasten to you. Reason this feels true: It’s basic Law of Attraction. When you feel genuine appreciation for something or about everything, even at times when you stretch to feel that way, it shifts your energy. It allows good stuff to start happening because that’s the vibration you put out and that’s what you magnetize to you. This is also based on personal experience. As most of us know, feelings opposite of appreciation magnetize undesirable experiences to us. I have personal experience with this one, as well.

It is Truth that good things come to me in expected, unexpected, and wonderful ways, and sometimes with a promptness that is astonishing. Reason this feels true: repeated personal experience. I’ve been pleasantly surprised in this way, so know it as a fact—a Truth.

It is Truth that my every need is met. Reason this feels true: Again, personal experience. No matter how many times my ego-aspect drives me around the bend about some things, I eventually return to the Truth, and this statement is proven true, once again.

It is Truth that when we live, not just know, the Law of Attraction and the Truth of the One Source of Infinite Love, we never need to go seeking—our own always comes to us. Reason this feels true: It has been my repeated experience that when I get into the flow, rather than focus on what I can get from the flow (and especially not entertain thoughts of lack), remarkable things happen. I put out a thought or request and it shows up in an amazing way and timing, often without my having done anything other than think the thought, and trust the Truth. This doesn’t mean that I never or seldom take action: I’m always taking action. It’s just that sometimes the only action that was required was trust in the Truth of this statement.

Ponder wrote that one Truth student said, “I have never yet seen a case of unanswered prayer, when the one who prayed was really ready to receive the answer.” Being ready to receive the answer—that’s the key. Do you trust Source enough to trust the answer you receive and when you receive it? That’s one to contemplate. Sometimes the answer we get is not one we would have chosen and the when-aspect is like a frightening amusement park ride. We find we have to rely on our trust in Source to have higher wisdom about this.

I offer this about these statements and any you have for yourself based in Truth: when that voice inside your head starts playing negative tapes about anything, pull up an appropriate Truth statement and repeat it as needed. Don’t let the ego-aspect’s frightened or frustrated attitude get to you or take you over. Cancel it with Truth.

Realization based in faith—the absence of doubt—precedes manifestation that is in your highest good and the highest good of all involved, no matter how it initially may appear. A realization of Truth does, indeed, banish every ill—or the inclination to worry and fret; and the prayer or statement through which realization comes is the prayer or statement that asserts the Truth. Statements that affirm the Truth lead us to experiences of the Truth and, therefore, realizations of the Truth.

What is the Truth? Some aspects are listed above as my statements; but you learn what the Truth is when you experience it in all its beauty, wonder, and constancy over and over. There are, of course, other Truths not listed here. Explore the difference between thought beliefs (temporary, possibly non-supportive) and Truth (something that is constant, unchanging, and always and in all ways supportive). Readapting something Ernest Holmes wrote: Those who get involved with Truth evolve. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.                  

          

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

You are welcome to use this article in your newsletter or on your blog/website as long as you use my complete bio with it.

Joyce L. Shafer is a Life Empowerment Coach dedicated to helping people feel, be, and live their true inner power. She’s author of “I Don’t Want to be Your Guru, But I Have Something to Say” and other books/e-books, and publishes a free weekly online newsletter that offers empowering articles. See all that’s offered by Joyce and on her site at http://stateofappreciation.weebly.com

Natural Chaos Should Not Be Feared but Embraced

We rely on rules to prevent chaos, but do rules ever get in the way of what’s natural? Is chaos ever a good thing?

We resist and or fear both unnatural chaos (for good reason) and natural chaos (because we’ve been conditioned to), so we rely on policies and rules to ease individual and collective fears and, we usually hope, to smooth life’s path. How’s that really working so far? Can we go too far with this? Can chaos ever be a good thing? What if natural chaos actually contributes to desired improvement? Let’s see.

I read an article posted on a social site: “School ditches rules and loses bullies.” It was a fascinating and revealing account of an Auckland, New Zealand, school that, as part of a university experiment, got rid of the playground rulebook (and all rules, which was beyond what the experiment required) that had been created to do what you might expect such rules to do: protect children and property, and maintain order. The astonishing results of the no-rules experiment were there were fewer injuries, less vandalism, and a significant drop in bullying. Also, concentration levels in the classroom increased. Could this remarkable result also apply outside that school’s environment, for all of us?

Principal Bruce McLachlan said, "We want kids to be safe and to look after them, but we end up wrapping them in cotton wool when in fact they should be able to fall over." This return to what it was like before health and safety policies began to rule at the school led to the re-realization that the activities and fun children create when allowed to, without numerous restrictions, kept them so occupied and creative that the time-out area was no longer needed, nor were as many teachers required to keep watch. "The kids were motivated, busy and engaged. In my experience, the time children get into trouble is when they are not busy, motivated and engaged. It's during that time they bully other kids, graffiti or wreck things around the school." The children were happy, and parents were happy because their children were happy.

The article went on to comment that a certain amount of risk-taking develops parts of the brain and develops the ability to work out consequences of actions. "You can't teach them that. They have to learn risk on their own terms. It doesn't develop by watching TV; they have to get out there."

Interestingly, the comments that resulted on the social site posting were equally revealing. One person was insistent (despite the proven results) that without rules, bullying would increase. The poster (both a mother and in the educational field) replied that children would learn consequences of actions and to defend themselves; and that in adulthood there is no teacher to run to. A replier to the poster’s comment stated that because he’d always had an adult to take care of everything for him when he was growing up, as an adult he doesn’t know what to do in certain circumstances. Another replier feared that children would be punished for standing up for or defending themselves, as had been her experience (which mimics what does happen in society at large: for example, a resident can be sued by a thief injured while breaking into the resident’s house).

The replier concerned about a potential (or, in his opinion, inevitable) increase in bullying wrote: “I get all that, but I think that no matter what, there would still be bullies. I know I, for one, would see this as an opportunity to be an even bigger bully. No rules? Then there would be more punishment for disobeying me. I’m not trying to say it’s a good thing, but I think it could lead to some not-so-good things.” The poster replied, “That’s the society we’ve become. You’re right. It’s kind of scary, not to mention that kids allowed to explore and make their own mistakes are often the ones that are inventors and the great thinkers. It would be a different world if we were allowed to just experience life, rather than just doing what we’re told.”

At this point, I added my two-cents-worth: Bullies happen—in the schoolyard and in the bigger world. They can legislate behavior all they want in both venues, but there will always be those with either the primary psychosis (from birth) or secondary psychosis (from conditioning), who act out as bullies. The only thing legislating behavior does is oppress those who don’t need the rules in the first place, those who know how to behave or who figure it out as they go—who figure out that they have a choice: find a way to co-exist as peacefully as possible or get into trouble. They can legislate behavior out the yin-yang, and it’ll still be the bullies who come out to “play” while all the others are following the rules—the unnecessary rules. It’s a matter of how much freedom will we give up because there are bullies in the schoolyard (or the global environment) who don’t play by anyone’s rules.

Natural chaos and unnatural chaos spawn different experiences and outcomes because of the energy and motivation inherent in each. In the matter of Prohibition, a law put into effect in the U.S. in the 1920s and pushed for by those who wanted to control others’ personal choices, specifically alcohol consumption, the unnatural chaos created by the imposed rule resulted in an escalation in organized crime and other crime, violence, and imprisonment. In the matter of the school and playground experiment, the natural chaos created by removing the rules so children worked things out for themselves (within reason, as they were children) resulted in enhanced self-learning, self-modifying, creativity, harmony, productivity, conflict resolution, self-governing behavior, and focus and attention. Although the article didn’t mention this, it’s difficult to imagine that a boost in self-confidence and self-reliance was not also a result.

How much of the chaos happening in the world now is actually caused by more or certain rules or policies being added or remaining rather than going to the true root of the matter and addressing the individuals causing the real problems? It’s become the “norm” in society to treat symptoms rather than target the true cause, be it alcoholism or health or whatever. It’s also become the “norm” to make rules everyone must follow, not just those who actually need proper and effective attention. It’s like what sometimes happened when I was in school: one student misbehaved and the entire class was punished.

We’re in a society that rewards people who follow the rules, even the nonsensical or infringing ones. The “rewards” are that they don’t get penalized; they get proverbial pats on the head; they get to feel superior to rule-breakers (or be envious, depending on the rules not followed). We have a profusion and confusion of rules, and the letter of the law tends to be followed rather than the spirit of the law. At a lower point on the gradient, specific utensils are to be arranged in a particular order and used as appropriate when you dine or you’re thought to be unsophisticated, low, less. At a middle point, stop signs at intersections are to encourage safety and avoid confusion; but if it’s three in the morning, no traffic anywhere, with clear visibility in all directions, and you slow or pause rather than stop, you could get a ticket because you broke a rule. At a more extreme point, something is legal in one county or state, but illegal in another; legal in one country, but illegal in another; immoral for individuals, but moral (or deemed acceptable) for those in positions of power. There are personal-choice decisions made for us that we should be responsible to make on our own.

If everyone everywhere learned and followed the moral compass to never steal or violate in any way the life, property, and security of anyone, and taught this to their children, what need of rules would there be? Who would need to create rules, and for what reason? The replier to the post about bullying believes the world would be an even more unsafe place without lots of rules and perhaps even more of them, then went on to explain why: because without them, he would be abusive or more abusive. During the experiment, I venture to say that any bullies who did attempt their behaviors with the children in the schoolyard were dealt with by the children.

For those who ignore moral right anyway, there is usually only one way to deal with or stop them: deterrents regarding their own well-being, to give them pause before they choose to exhibit such behaviors or to help them correct behaviors. This may sound harsh to some, but it’s akin to preventive healthcare. In the school experiment, it’s possible that several children stood together to oppose a bully who then backed down, or perhaps they refused to include any bully in activities and play, until the bully chose to behave better and did, and perhaps demonstrated a sincere desire to contribute in a productive way.

If some people never broke or ignored certain and, particularly, unnecessary rules, including academic; never thought outside of the creativity box; or colored outside the lines, we’d have a poverty of inventions, innovations, improvements, and cultural arts. We could, indeed, become better problem solvers than we currently are, individually and collectively. Natural chaos brings our attention to where problems or issues exist so we can resolve them in a beneficial way—or is supposed to. But so many, as with the replier, hold the belief that mankind in general, as individuals and as a collective, are incapable of controlling their behaviors and actions or of truly knowing and honoring the difference between moral right and wrong, so must have rules imposed on them/us. All we have to do is look around and realize this is not wholly true or accurate. Yes, there are those who seem not to possess a moral compass or would act against their moral compass, but they could be addressed individually, as needed. Their unnatural chaos tendencies could be managed. And if you think about it, those who do not follow a moral compass are outnumbered by those who do.

Natural chaos causes inventions and innovations to flourish, as has happened throughout history: We have no cause to fear it, but every reason to embrace it. As Plato said, “Necessity … the mother of invention.” Chaos is a teacher, including teaching us what not to do. Fear of chaos can lead to the death of imagination, and to the end of freedom, on a school playground or in daily life. Ben Franklin said, “Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither, and will lose both.”

The school experiment demonstrated the positive results of natural chaos and the freedom to address it that leads to better self-governing, personal responsibility, and improved creativity, productivity, and cooperation required for quality problem solving and as-peaceful-as-possible co-existence. The rules had, previously, created something of a mental, imaginational, and socially restrictive enclosure for the children. The absence of the rules opened “doors and windows and skylights” to let freshness into their minds. It opened a beneficial level of freedom for the students, teachers, and, yes, even most of the bullies.

Imagination and freedom of thought, word, and action—guided by moral right and Natural Laws of the One Creator and a mutual understanding and agreement about these—are needed to create, including to create a better state of existence if the one experienced isn’t working as well as it could. We, as individuals and a collective, have an obligation to ourselves and others to work on and increase our consciousness and awareness so that rules are not required for peaceful co-existence and quality of life. The school children in the experiment proved—or rather, reminded us—that this is possible. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.           

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce Shafer