Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Be True to You at Your Crossroads Point

Have you ever stood or are you standing at a crossroads now, not positively certain which path to take? What technique do you use to choose?

You may turn to family or friends for their thoughts and ideas. This is one tactic if you’re looking to brainstorm for ideas, methods, and techniques to consider. Some who are well-meaning may say, “Let me tell you what you ought to do,” or they use the dreaded word “should.” When this happens, nod politely, but stay true to yourself.

Crossroads are opportunities to aim at the target(s) that help you create your desired reality, even if it’s just to do something different and you aren’t quite sure what yet. That happens. Such times may cause anxiety; but that’s usually because somewhere at the back of your mind or deep in your heart, you wonder, “Can I or should I really go for it?”

If you have a dream and you share it with others, you risk hearing opinions that fall anywhere on the gradient between highly useful and not at all useful, depending on who you speak with. Nor can you let anything anyone says from their own perspective (and fears) cause you to question your worth or the worth of your dream or goal. Not everyone will feel excited about or share your enthusiasm, because it’s your dream, after all, not theirs. Sometimes you have to amp up the power of your dream by staying silent about it until the right moment. And, you want to put your energy into taking action, not talking about taking action.

One fear you may have is of (pardon the repetitions) coloring outside the lines or thinking and acting outside the box. But what if your unique way of doing something, or the way you’d like to but hesitate about, is exactly what some are waiting for?

Here are some questions to ask when you’re at a crossroads (answer them in order, and don’t limit your answers with logic—be honest with yourself):
Who would you really like to interact with? This could be clients, customers, readers, team players, group members, etc; but who would your favorite “playmates” be?
Why them?
What about them or their lives will be different as a result of engaging with you?
What are the ways you might do this with or for them? Which of these ways really jazz you? Which one could you begin to develop and move forward on now?

You cannot live your life trying to mold yourself to opinions or expectations of others. They may be happy if you do, but you’ll be miserable. A dialogue line in a movie called “The Movie Hero” is, “...you can either die trying or die wishing you had.” Of course, you can succeed while you live. It’s also a success to go for your dream, whatever the outcome. Better to say, “I gave it all I had (and enjoyed every second),” than, “I never gave myself the chance.”

It’s best to ignore anyone who believes you can’t get there from here. There’s always a way whether it’s a metaphorical jet, boat, car, or your feet. If you have a dream, don’t just wish it, intend it. Commit, be flexible, and stay true to yourself.

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