Friday, September 27, 2013

You Are Not Your Thoughts

Of the many thoughts you have each day, how many help you, how many hinder you? You can shift this in your favor.

This article may seem like some pretty heavy stuff for some, or stronger than I usually write, but I ask you to stick with me all the way to the end. Thoughts happen. They are like the stock exchange’s fast-moving digital tickertape, but much, much faster. But there are the thoughts and there is the YOU, the “consciousness” receiver of the thoughts. When you can distinguish between the two or remind yourself to do this, you begin to release yourself from being a prisoner of your thoughts. If or whenever this seems a challenge, just remind yourself that inside of a prison is constraint; outside of it is flow and autonomy.

There is a real YOU—the infinite consciousness that you are—that is not your body, your mind, or your emotions, as strange as that may seem. The “you” having the life experience provides information to your brain based on external stimuli because YOU are here in a body having experiences that use the fives senses to do so. But you are always, always more than that. When you have that feeling that says, “I know I’m more than this,” you’re right!

Life feels difficult and perplexing at times, or a good deal of the time, because you’ve believed the five-sense “you” is the real one, as well as everything the five senses input into your brain, which your brain then decodes to make some sense of that information so you can interpret “reality”. The sense we make of the information is more often than not colored by our beliefs and our conditioning because the brain filters signals we receive about “reality” to fit our beliefs. Sir Francis Bacon said: “The world is not to be narrowed till it will go into the understanding…but the understanding to be expanded and opened till it can take in the image of the world as it is in fact.” 

You want to look at what you believe and who you believe it for. If it isn’t for YOU, you want to look at that as well. You see, restrictive beliefs result in a restrictive experience of “reality”, rather than a big-picture, holistic one. Restrictive beliefs, especially rigid ones, suppress our ability to open and expand consciousness. As we expand our consciousness (actually, lift the veil hiding our consciousness from us), we expand how our brain decodes information it receives; we discern differently because we have more information and an improved means to process it. We and how we experience life expands. That’s the only direction we and life can go in once we re-mind ourselves to expand our consciousness. You can have something of an experience of who the real YOU is if you watch Jill Bolte Taylor’s video about her Stroke of Insight, where she had a direct experience of full consciousness as one with All There Is compared to the I-am-Jill’s mind and separate, when she had a stroke that closed off her ability to interpret, in the standard manner, the signals her brain received about the world around her.

The five-sense “you” relies on those senses to navigate the life experience. YOU use the five senses but you have a sixth sense (maybe more) called intuition, or inner knowing. Intuition (inner knowing) is not an anomaly just for some. We all have it. I learned this as a fact when I went through the Silva Mind Method training a few decades ago. Even the strongest disbelievers in the class performed, as we had to, to graduate.

Intuition, or inner knowing, is one way we plug into the infinite consciousness we are and are a part of. The esoteric ones of old, and a number of our contemporaries, knew and know this. We may not be brought up to know this about ourselves, we may even be told it’s a “sin” to use this part of our true nature, but it’s still there for us, ready to assist our navigation through life in ways we desire but don’t necessarily feel skilled at using. But we can put it into practice.

Your five senses can cause you to believe the “matrix” is real, that what the senses perceive is all there is, which is quite different from the real All There Is—the One Source, which is limitless in what it can supply and provide for you, and does. The interesting thing about this is that quantum mechanics has proven that nothing, no thing, is there. The only thing there or here is the consciousness creating the appearance of reality, which is a pretty impressive hologram, so impressive that we can literally bump our heads on it. Ernest Homes wrote, “Nothing moves but mind.” He wrote this quite a while before quantum mechanics caught up with this as a fact.

This is an extraordinarily challenging truth for most of us to believe, much less grasp, because though true, it’s contrary to what most believe because of what we were taught and are still being taught, despite the empirical evidence (and ancient knowing). Humans managed to accept that Earth wasn’t the center of the universe and was round, not flat (once they knew they wouldn’t be punished or worse for believing that, and once those in authority could no longer get away with insisting it was flat, etc.). But this fact about reality we’re looking at here is a bit harder to wrap the mind around because we’ve believed the opposite for so long and because of how effective the physics of it all is, as well as what we’re told “reality” is.

When thoughts happen, someone—in your case YOU—is there to notice them. When a person’s body stops, their infinite consciousness departs the body suit but doesn’t cease to exist. This is evidenced by out-of-body experiences, near-death experiences, and more. Even though we know of these experiences or know people who’ve had them, or have had them ourselves, we still don’t necessarily integrate the full meaning for us into our daily lives.

Many of us who’ve been on the spiritual or metaphysical path say we believe we’re infinite consciousness. Do we really believe it, or understand it? If we’re infinite consciousness after we leave the body, then we’re infinite consciousness right now. When we believe only what our five senses supply us with that our brains decode and we (our “you” aspects) then interpret based on how we were conditioned by the various systems in place that hold so much influence over us and our lives (which influences past, present, and future perceptions and experiences), we cut ourselves off from our full, true nature. We say we want to be authentic, but what does that mean to us? Will we include the fact we are more than our thoughts and emotions and body? Or that, in fact, we are not them, that we simply use them while we’re here?

We don’t like feeling limited, but we aren’t too excited about going the distance with what’s being discussed here. In fact, it can be frightening because we’ll have to step away from tribal mentality, which might make the tribe leaders and members a bit peeved with us. (Ever wondered why that is?) Just that thought, or acting on it, can make us feel alone, but only until we find others who understand and live this. Not going the distance is making a choice, one we’re not happy with the results of but are used to, or conditioned to be used to, or are afraid to accept and allow.

We identify with our thoughts, and when we do so, we believe they express absolute truth. All you have to do is have one of your assumptions proven false to see this, which is a minimal form or example of this. We have tens of thousands of thoughts each day. We, as our five-sense “you”, may believe we need to believe each of those thoughts, simply because they’re there. You may recall the revelation that subliminal messages are placed in movies and commercials and more to influence people to buy products or believe whatever. Are those your thoughts? Did you choose them? YOU can choose your thoughts, just as you can choose which item on the stock exchange tickertape to pay attention to or focus on. You really can.

Is it easy to remember you’re more than your thoughts, more than what the five senses indicate you are? Not necessarily, because every day you wake up and set about dealing with whatever you deal with. What’s going on around you or “you”, based on your beliefs, can convince you to be busy in action or have busy-mind, rather than productive-constructive mind, or relaxed mind, which is usually when inner knowing communicates with us. With either or both of these busy aspects going on, who feels they have time or energy to remember he or she is infinite consciousness having a human experience? But we can remember this, even amid the busyness of our lives.

It is important to make time or remember to plug into the Truth of who we are and into our connection with the One Source so we don’t get lost in illusions and delusions. Otherwise, we’re prone to believe we’re weak rather than strong, stuck rather than creative and innovative, limited rather than infinite, not in control of our choices when we can be, and so on—even though some days or during some experiences, we feel limited more than infinite; but we can remember and recover our footing, if we know about this in the first place.

It will also help to know and remember that two of the parts of your brain are the R-complex, which is responsible for our fight, flight, or freeze reactions, and the neocortex, which helps us think things through. In the briefest of nutshells, you have both the ability to react based on whether you feel safe or not, which is based on your thoughts about events, as well as the ability to think about your thoughts a bit before you react. One reason we feel we can’t think straight or with more conscious consideration when we’re having strong (negative) emotions is because the R-complex is activated to ensure survival. This is why we can think straight, or more consciously, when we’re relaxed, without busy-mind.

The R-complex cannot distinguish between the past and present, and is why your body responds to a negative memory as though “it’s” happening now, which causes you to behave as though your survival is at stake, even if you’re lying in a hammock, with everything quiet all around you. If you rely on the R-complex too often or too much, you don’t exercise the neocortex. You then create brain “ruts” that lead you down the path of reactive behavior more than create neuronal “paths” that lead to conscious consideration. This alone may inspire you to become aware of thoughts and aware of the thinker.

How can you distinguish between thoughts and inner knowing? Thoughts have a loudness quality to them: they’re insistent. Inner knowing is subtle. It will nudge you once or twice then go quiet if you don’t listen. You can practically feel thoughts in your head, almost like a movie screen on your forehead facing inward. You feel inner knowing in your chest center, maybe you even feel it radiate into your limbs, but you don’t feel it in your head. Put another way, you feel it in your heart-energy center, not in your mind.

Your thoughts may lead you to want to be considered clever (after all, cleverness is rewarded), which your mind, through thoughts, can accommodate; but clever and wise are not the same thing. Wisdom is something your infinite consciousness provides. Cleverness without wisdom can be disastrous. It can lead to creating things or taking actions that do more short- and long-term harm than any real good, because cleverness doesn’t always consider ethics, morality, justice, and overall well-being, whereas infinite consciousness always does. Cleverness AND wisdom is a beneficial combination. We can look at our own lives and at what’s going on around us to see when cleverness, wisdom, or the combination is used, and when they are not.

Our thoughts based on only five senses keep us occupied, so occupied that we often can’t see the bigger picture going on around us. However, we can choose to put our attention on our connection to the One Source so we keep in mind who we really are, which is not the thoughts we have and not the thoughts we’re told to have or are influenced to have by anyone else. We can look at what’s going on in us and around us and ascertain whether we follow the path the One Source would encourage, or the herd. When we realize we’re not our thoughts, we can think and feel and know for ourselves, and do so from a higher perspective, a perspective more akin to the One Source than the “matrix”. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate. 

Practice makes progress.
© Joyce Shafer

You are welcome to use this article in your newsletter or on your blog/website as long as you use my complete bio with it.

Saturday, September 21, 2013

What’s There to Complain About?

People might say there’s a lot to complain about these days, and so it’s been throughout history. How’s that working for you and for all of us so far?

We all complain aloud at times. Does it count as complaining if we do it silently to ourselves? Yep. And we’re likely guiltier of this silent “complaint-athon” activity than complaining aloud because of how many thoughts we have each day. It would astonish us to actually mark down how many times we complain in just one twenty-four-hour period. That’s a lot of thought energy going—where, and to what end? Complaining aloud or not attracts more to complain about into our lives. We also cause ourselves to feel bad when we complain.

Complaining is a sign of discontent. This feels even worse when we do nothing to create improvement at our inner and or outer levels about what we’re unhappy with. Discontent is an opportunity to ask how you can improve or make whatever you’re discontent about better, even if just a bit. The reality is that whether you feel discontent or not is up to you. Discontent is a feeling brought about by a thought you have. Ugh! This means we are responsible for what we choose to think about after the first time the thought pops up and then what we feel as a result of this thought process. We may not like this, but it’s a fact.

This doesn’t mean we are to believe we are supposed to feel positive only. That’s a fallacy, an imposition, and unrealistic. However, most of our everyday, continuous bad or unhappy feelings are self-generated, and that’s what we want to consider and address. A real need to vent in order to be heard and validated is necessary to all of us at times. But we should be able to recognize that once we’ve told our story once or a few times, if we continue to talk about the same thing over and over—unless it’s a deep psychological matter that needs qualified professional assistance, we’ve gone beyond venting and have entered the realm of complaining, especially if we take no productive or constructive inner or outer action to improve ourselves and or what upset us in the first place. This doesn’t mean we are to set about changing everything and everyone we are discontent with, which is impossible (and in some cases, rude), but to at least change something within us before we aim at changing what we can that’s external to us.

Self-pity is a form of complaining, and demonstrates you’re not using your personal power properly. Any form of consistent complaining, especially about the same matter(s), depletes the personal power you do have. It hinders your ability to remember that your power and strength is within you, not outside of you. Your personal power is within your thoughts, within your ability to choose your thoughts, before it’s found anywhere else. Self-pity, or any form of consistent complaining, is like a sticky substance, which is why it makes people uncomfortable; it makes them suddenly remember an imaginary appointment they’re about to be late for or that a pot is boiling over on the empty stove, so they have to disengage the call. They feel compelled to flee because they know at an energetic level that self-pity is a one-way road downward, possibly into an abyss.

Complaining is resisting. It’s getting stuck where you are and putting your attention and energy “there” rather than putting your attention on what you can do that you will do. You can’t awaken or expand your consciousness if you practice resistance and fear more than you do awareness and flow with what-is in the moment. If you want to awaken or expand consciousness, you must strengthen your spiritual foundation based on your relationship with Source and your self, to help you release resistance and fear, in order to go beyond them. You must look for solutions rather than amplify the problems.

When you focus your attention through complaining, resistance, and fear, you decrease available brain power, which is the very thing you need to move forward and upward. Those who have awakened consciousness or strive to will have their emotions stirred up at times, but they also know they are to strive to move forward, and they do so, as soon as possible or practical for them.

When you feel any level of negativity, and especially strong negativity, the way to reduce the charge of that energy is to release resistance to what-is. The way to release resistance is to find something or someone to appreciate then connect with that feeling and energy. There is no resistance in appreciation. Think about that for a moment. The way to convert complaining, in any of its forms, into personal power is through genuine appreciation, which is a form of infinite love. Appreciation, aloud or not, attracts more to appreciate. And, you instantly feel better when you do this. Maybe not fully the way you want to feel, but better.

When you complain, especially if consistently or pretty close to that, silently or aloud, you focus on what you consider wrong. When you find something or someone to appreciate, you shift your point of attention from what’s “wrong” to what’s right, to what’s good in your life, and what’s working; and this attention leads you to put your attention on how YOU can improve, which leads you to improve your situation and or experiences.

What contributes to complaining as a practice? I’d say the number one reason is this: Not loving yourself. Begin saying “I love myself” several times a day, especially before you go to sleep and when you wake. And I hope you recognize that I’m not referring to a narcissistic or ego-based love, but more like the love you feel when you gaze at a sleeping child you cherish or a beloved pet. Recognizing that love you have for them, how do you treat them? How intentional and committed are you to give them proper care? This is how you want to treat you. And the way you treat yourself ripples outward to how to treat others and life.

Other, “common” things that contribute to complaining as a practice include: Inadequate or poor quality sleep and rest or recharge time; poor diet (garbage in, garbage out—energy-wise); watching more news than you need to; dwelling on or staying stuck in self-pity; allowing the habit of or addiction to complaining to run you and your life; criticizing others (as though your own slate is clean). All of these and other things you might list contribute to or build an unhappy life, which leads to complaining about your life. You might believe that if there were no causes for these things listed to happen (others or life doing it to you in the first place), you’d stop complaining. But that’s a bassackwards approach that has never and will never work.

When this is your state of mind, it’s also your state of being. It affects you physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. When one area is out of balance, the other three are affected. This state of mind robs you of energy, creativity, and life force. And you are the only one who can shift this. “If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results.” – Unknown

Some of the changes you can start with include doing the opposite of those energy-depleting behavior practices listed above. Do at least one opposite practice every day, but every day find something and someone to appreciate, or at least three of each to appreciate. Do the “I love myself” practice every day and watch and see how you start to feel, how your energy begins to shift upwards, and the improvements you begin to come up with and act on.

Most of the “crapolla” we put ourselves through and allow in our life is because we haven’t allowed ourselves to truly love ourselves (we take care of what we truly love). We burden others with our need to feel loved; and even if they love us, we still may not feel the self-love we crave. We bought into the indoctrinated idea that loving ourselves is a “bad thing” to do, when not loving ourselves in the way I described is absolutely one of the worst things we can do to ourselves, others, and our life.

James Altucher wrote: “This is how we form a better society. First we become better as individuals. You can’t help others if you look in the mirror and hate what you see.” Of course, he isn’t referring to our physical appearance, but how we feel about ourselves. If we appreciate ourselves, this influences how we create and nurture our life experiences and personal and professional relationships, and how we build and nurture society. Unfortunately, we, for the most part, really do love others as we love ourselves. We need to amp up love in our lives and on our planet; and not starting next week—now.

How can we do and be better at this? We have to improve our thinking. When our thinking improves, life improvements follow. For our thinking to improve, we need to start with better health (diet, sleep, exercise); better mindset (adequate sleep, less stress—whatever it takes to get you there, but more often than not it’s more about shifting your perspective first); feeding your mind with better information through books and other media that uplift and or help you expand your conscious awareness; connecting with your trust in Source and of yourself, and daily practice of thoughts that get you off the negativity merry-go-round. 

A moment-by-moment question we can ask is this: Which one will result in joy and or fulfillment for me as I move through this situation (or day)—complaining or appreciation? And please remember: if you don’t like something, figure out how you can improve yourself (starting with your perspective) and or the situation even a bit. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate. 

Practice makes progress.
© Joyce Shafer

Monday, September 16, 2013

Would You Choose a Noble Life Or an Impressive One?

Are we too focused on impressing others? It can feel good to impress others, but sometimes it costs us. Is it always worth the cost?

One reason our ego-aspect exists is to provide and serve our self-preservation motivation, which is why ego wants what it wants when it wants it—sometimes with an at-any-cost energy underlying it. However, sometimes fear of consequences does come into play and ego hesitates or backs down, though likely complains about doing so. A desire to impress others is a form of self-preservation, as far as the ego-aspect is concerned. Someone self-actualized never worries about impressing others. They focus on maintaining personal integrity while building and living a fulfilling-for-them life.

Self-preservation at any cost is a program installed in each of us to help us stay safe and alive. But this program is why some of our thoughts aren’t nice ones or noble ones. We’re all subject to such thoughts. But we can override the program when and as appropriate to go beyond the ego-aspect’s wanting and move into head-and-heart alignment instead. I always appreciate the still, small voice of spiritual wisdom when it speaks from its intention and purpose to assist me into and to act from head-and-heart alignment. There are times, though, that my ego-aspect is speaking too loudly and I have to wait until I calm myself enough to hear a wiser voice.

Letting the ego-aspect rule can cause problems, if not misery, as in this example. Someone told me he’d asked for God’s answer about something. He used (or misused) his ego-aspect to “decide” what “what came next” had meant, rather than letting his spiritual aspect show him the bigger picture and truth, which resulted in chaos and emotional pain for all involved. He allowed his ego-aspect to guide him to impress his negative perspective upon others as though it was a fact. Since I know him, I know he tends to be swayed by his ego-aspect more often than his spirit one (though, sometimes he does listen to his spiritual aspect). The result is that head-and-heart alignment is seldom his experience, and he’s unhappy, and sometimes miserable, a good deal of the time.

Why does it seem that some don’t have this guiding voice assisting them or don’t listen to it, or that we sometimes ignore our own inner spiritual voice? Maybe it’s because we have to choose and then condition ourselves to repeatedly choose head-and-heart alignment, which is an act of giving our spiritual aspect more importance than our ego-aspect. It’s also more involved to do this than it is to follow ego: following ego requires little to no conscious thought, whereas aiming at head-and-heart alignment does. If we solely follow and act on ego-aspect’s wants, we may get what it wants, but are we at peace? Can we easily live with ourselves?

I recall paying my respects to Jim, a former school chum, at his mother’s wake. He was uncomfortable seeing schoolmates because he felt he had no personal story to impress us with, like career and assets, because for three years he’d given full-time care to his ailing then dying mother. I told him he had nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about, that what he’d done was noble and that noble far outweighed impressive. I can still see how his body and energy relaxed and the expression of appreciation in his eyes when I said this to him.

I don’t, however, think that when any of us act in a noble fashion that we’re aware of it, just as Jim wasn’t. We simply believe we’re doing the right thing. None of us asks, “How can I be noble?” We do, though, look for or aim at doing the right thing. We all know it can be a challenge to feel certain what the right thing is at times, or we can be tricked by the ego-aspect about what the right thing is. As has been said, “The road to Hell is paved with good intentions.” It’s probably safe to say that if you can live with yourself and maintain your integrity as a result of your choices, you did the right thing or what felt appropriate for you that you had head-and-heart alignment with.

The ego-aspect often aims at “impressive”, meaning how we can impress others—or even impress our perspective on them; the spiritual-aspect can keep us in personal integrity and noble acts when required or needed. The word noble has many meanings. The one I refer to here is “having or showing high moral qualities or ideals, or greatness of character.” Impressive is impressive, but noble is even more so. And, noble acts don’t have to be big in nature, just demonstrate greatness of character or strength of character. A kindness at the right moment is a noble act.

Sometimes we find ourselves in Jim’s situation of impressive-to-others vs. noble, or some other form of this moment of choice. Ego wants to pull us in its preferred direction, but again, will we be at peace with our choices? Will we be able to live with or be at peace with the consequences of our choices? We want a “yes” to both questions and to find what gets us there, even if it means being discontent or uncomfortable at times while we work through things.

As I write this, it’s the week of September 11. Living in New York City at that time, it’s especially easy for me to recall being in Manhattan and my own experiences that day, as well as the stories of so many who chose a noble path (though this wasn’t their focus; doing the right thing was) to save and assist others, at the risk—and in a good number of instances, at the cost—of their own self-preservation. Disasters stun us, but the noble acts that arise from them speak to us at the core of our spiritual aspects. Noble acts of ours and others remind all of us of who we can be, or rather, who we really are underneath layers of beliefs that limit us or lead us astray.

Yes, it feels good to be impressive; it feels good and logical to self-preserve. But add integrity and even small noble acts that come from our spirit rather than our ego, and do this daily—well, that’s quite a formula for elevating our lives and the lives of others; and that IS impressive. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.                     
Practice makes progress.
© Joyce Shafer

Do the Right Thing and Accept the Consequence

By Barbara Berger

(Excerpts from Are You Happy Now? 10 Ways to Live a Happy Life)

The number 7 cause of suffering and unhappiness is not doing the right thing because you’re afraid of the consequences.

Doing the right thing
….The impulse to do the right thing burns brightly in each of us.
It is our nature, the heart of us, which is love. When we oppose our innermost nature, we suffer and so do others. That is why I feel so strongly that if you want to live a happy life, do not cover up this urge, this flame, this bright impulse to do the right thing (which is always an expression of love) – regardless of the cost. This flame is your morning star, this flame is your guiding light, this flame is the heart of you.
Doing the right thing on a daily basis  
Doing the right thing is not just a social-political activity or just about doing the right thing in the big areas of your life; it’s also a daily activity because every moment of our lives we are faced with choices big and small. And every choice, every action has consequences. This is because of the law of cause and effect, which is always in operation and which means that every thought, word and action sets in motion a chain of events and happenings that echo down through the ages. We live in a universe of interdependence where no man or woman is an island, but where each one of us is part of the same fabric, part of the same web of life, each inextricably influencing each other and the whole.
That is why it is so important to be mindful and pay attention to what we are thinking, saying and doing. Because everything we think, say, and do has consequences. When we are mindful and always try to align ourselves with our true inner knowingness, we are living and acting with as much awareness as we are capable of – in both the public and private arena. More than this we cannot do.
With this growing awareness, we discover that no matter where we are or who we are, we are always being given the opportunity to do the right thing. Regardless of our station in life, regardless of our culture, age or sex, choices are appearing before us all the time, each and every day. This is the way of it as it unfolds before us. Events may be big or small, but all events and activities are equally worthy of our attention. Every event, every issue, every situation is awaiting our stamp – your stamp and mine – the stamp of our integrity – the stamp that expresses our highest vision of what life can be on earth.
In every case, in every situation, it is our intention that counts. Intention is the golden key and determines our focus. We must ask ourselves: Is our intention for the highest Good? Is our intention for peace, love and harmony? Is our intention to avoid or end suffering? These are the questions we need to ask ourselves over and over again as we proceed through our day. These are the questions we need to ask as we reflect on our choices and our activities.

Read the entire article, Do the Right Thing and Accept the Consequence, by Barbara Berger on Guest Articles page at 
Barbara Berger is the best-selling author of The Road to Power – Fast Food for the Soul (published in 30 languages) and The Awakening Human Being – A Guide to the Power of Mind. Her highly acclaimed book, Are You Happy Now? 10 Ways to Live a Happy Life (already published in 14 languages) is being released in the US and the UK on August 16, 2013. The books can be ordered on For more about Barbara Berger see

Are You in Alignment with the Real You?

Are You in Alignment with the Real You?

By Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D.

Let’s look at the concept of alignment first. It basically refers to positioning, to being in a line with something else. We get our tires aligned. We align a text in a document we write in such a way that the margins are straight and uniform. Wikipedia tells us that alignment is the adjustment of an object in relation to other objects.

How does this apply to us as human beings?

Better Results
To answer that we might like to look at the effect of aligning any of the examples mentioned. Aligned tires run in unison. Because of their alignment, the car works more efficiently. In a document that is aligned, the text looks more polished and pulled together, more professional. An object that has been adjusted in relation to other objects generally works more smoothly, and we can count on better results.

When we look at ourselves, it’s a similar story…we get better results, we work better, we function better, things go more smoothly. You might say that being in alignment is like getting a regiment of soldiers all lined up…and so it is if your inner and outer selves are aligned

How To Tell When You Aren’t Aligned
When you are feeling uneasy, uncomfortable, not calm, not peaceful—agitated, mixed up, at cross-purposes, jittery, and so on, you can pretty well count on the fact that you are not aligned with who you really are. Can you imagine lining up a banana with a walnut? It just doesn’t work, does it? One is more or less round, and hard, and brown. The other is elongated, curved, soft, and yellow. They align in the sense that both need their outer shell or peel to be removed in order to be eaten, but other than that, there is little alignment that takes place between the two.

And so it is with you, when you are aligning yourself to some way of life, or living your life, or some purpose that has nothing to do with who you really are at the core of your being. The feelings of uneasiness, discomfort, agitation, etc., are showing you as clearly as if there were a signpost on the road: This is not the way to go forward.

Read the rest of Are You in Alignment with the Real You? by Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D., on Guest Articles page at

Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D. (Psychology), author of Rewiring the Soul: Finding the Possible Self, is a practicing psychotherapist who works with an international clientele in Marbella, Spain using an integral focus on body, mind and soul. She has published a newsletter in English and Spanish since 2004, facilitates monthly workshops and broadcast a weekly radio show both locally in Spain, as well as on the internet for seven years. Prior to her work in private practice she was Director of Sales & Marketing at several luxury beach properties in Spain and Mexico and was married to a diplomat. She has three sons.

Connect with her on Twitter / Facebook / LinkedIn / YouTube .

Friday, September 6, 2013

Resistance to What-Is Is a Prison without Bars

Resistance is the emotional equivalent of “I Don’t Want THIS.” How many times a day do we bump against this one? What can we do about it?

Resistance feels bad. In fact, at times it feels as bad, or worse, than what you resist. At the very least, it amplifies the negative energy you’re feeling, which is fear-based in one way or another. When you amplify the energy you feel, you amplify your transmission of it to the field that matches your transmission, as though it was an order that you’ve placed to be filled. (Please keep in mind that this works for positive energy, as well.)

I found myself facing this when things were not going as I would have preferred in a particular instance in my life, and appeared to be possibly escalating. Resistance welled up in me. Imagined undesired scenarios were called forth by my ego-aspect. I could practically hear my ego-aspect shouting, “No, no, no! I don’t want that!” Fortunately, I realized what I was doing. Fortunately, I understand, even though I temporarily forget—especially when I’m feeling strong emotions, that what is resisted persists. That whatever energy is transmitted gets matched. That resistance never makes me feel better, only worse.

So I told myself what will be will be, and that if there was any more to say, think, or feel about this, it was best to ask for the strength and wherewithal to step up to the plate and perform to the best of my ability at the inner and outer levels, if stepping up did become required of me. This eased the energy, and what my ego-aspect wanted to resist didn’t manifest as fully as it might have…this time. In a bit, I explain why “this time” is important to include.

Resistance is very much like pressing on a bruise or a wound and complaining that it hurts to do that. Why do we resist? Maybe it’s because we focus more on what we want and don’t want than on how we want to be and don’t want to be like. Do we actually resist events or do we actually resist how we may be during and as a result of events? Are the two independent of each other? These questions are worth pondering.

Maybe we can help ourselves if we deepen our understanding of what we resist and why, because there’s more than one form of what-is that we resist. Let’s take a look at them so we can more easily identify them when they surface.

Of-the-moment what-is: This form is what’s happening in the moment we’re in. If it’s not what we prefer or desire, we resist that it’s happening at all. But what we need to remember is that while an event is happening, the dynamics are still in motion. The outcome is not necessarily a given; so we have a level of flexibility to shift our perspective, the dynamics, and the outcome. Resistance to what’s happening won’t get us where we want to go or lead us to how we want to be. Choosing how and who we want to be will.

What-is du jour: When we wake each day, this form is the one we believe reflects the predominant state of our life. It’s the one we can replace resistance to with acceptance that what has already happened has happened or is in play at this time, an intention to shift it, and a plan we follow to shift it or us, whether the action energy of this is inner, outer, or both.

What-may-be: We resist this form because we feel not in control of the dynamics, and we don’t like that feeling at all. It’s the one where an understanding of how Law of Attraction works would serve us, though this knowledge and practice serves us in any of the what-is forms. This form is one where our reliance on Trust in Source and ourselves would benefit us, as well as Trust about what will be: there’s always more going on than just what we see close up, and all things end and result in new beginnings.

What-will-be: We share “reality” with others who have their own dynamics in process and progress, as well as their own beginnings and endings; with Mother Nature; and with what goes on in the universe beyond our Earth home, which is where “this time” fits in. Resistance is a waste of energy here. Better to prepare and strengthen ourselves at both the inner and outer levels, but especially the inner. It’s also when “What can I do?” or “How can I help or be of service?” are questions that can guide us through the dynamics and the outcomes. We may not feel good about events that unfold, but we can choose to do what causes us to feel integrity toward ourselves in relation to our thoughts, words, and actions as they relate to events and shifts.

What-was: This form is often confused by our ego-aspect with what-is du jour. We call it the past, and we resist it, even though the only thing there is to resist in real-time is the thoughts we engage about what-was. Granted, results of what-was may affect or influence what-is du jour, but our resistance to what has happened or what has changed from what used to be, often rules our thoughts, feelings, words, and actions—energies we could put to better use to create as much of what we prefer at the inner and outer levels of our experiences of ourselves and life.

Resistance, especially sustained resistance, is a prison without bars. Resistance keeps us from seeing the truth about what we are truly capable of, what our true strengths are, and how creative and supportive we can actually be. It causes us to forget we are co-creators, that we are compassionate, that we are never alone (Source is always, always with us), and that there is always a bigger picture in play. Resistance is a mental, emotional, spiritual, or life-experience prison we put ourselves in, a prison that we alone can release ourselves from.

Resistance happens and it’s understandable why it does, because it is ultimately about feelings: the ones we don’t want to allow into and as our experience. However, we don’t have to let it run or ruin our experiences and our lives. When you feel resistance, maybe it will help you to identify which form it is so you can understand why you’re feeling it, which can help you figure out what to do about it so you can free yourself from its Velcro-like grip on you.

Realize that your life experience is not as much about how you want to feel as it is about how you want to feel about you. Then you’ll be able to tune into conscious awareness, or choose to do so, so you make decisions and take actions from head-and-heart alignment rather than resistance-reaction. The two most powerful aspects you can aim for, and which can assist you out of resistance, are genuine appreciation and integrity. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.                     
Practice makes progress.
© Joyce Shafer

Release Yourself From Painful Resistance to the Lessons of Life By Guy Finley

Key Lesson: No event itself creates anger (in us) anymore than a flame causes a moth to fly into it and be consumed. Events serve to reveal our nature (to us) by stirring and releasing from its un-plumbed depths some quality or character within it, bringing up and into us an awareness of its (unimaginable) potential.

Agree to Be Changed

Events in our lives serve lessons. Lessons serve truths. And each truth that we will submit to changes us into a human being more whole than we were prior to the event.
What we suffer over in life is lessons we have yet to learn. When we are in pain, it's because a lesson has been refused.

For example, let's say you're talking to somebody and you see that you can't stop from saying something cruel. In the split second you see that you can't stop yourself from making that cruel comment, you have a flash of painful understanding that you weren't what you imagined yourself to be prior to the event. Then up comes resistance to that painful truth, meaning everything in you finds a way to justify what you've just said instead of recognizing that you had mistaken yourself to be something you are not. In that moment of instantaneous recognition of the truth of yourself is the lesson riding in on the back of the event.

Keep reading Release Yourself From Painful Resistance to the Lessons of Life by Guy Finley on Guest Articles page at

Guy Finley is the best-selling author of The Secret of Letting Go, The Essential Laws of Fearless Living, and 35 other works that have sold over a million copies in 18 languages worldwide. His work has been featured on hundreds of radio and TV networks including NBC, CBS, ABC, CNN, NPR, and PBS. Guy has spent the last 30 years showing individuals the authentic path to a higher life filled with happiness, success, and true love. Finley lives and teaches in Merlin, Oregon where he is Director of non-profit Life of Learning Foundation.

Follow Your Passion and Accept the Consequences By Barbara Berger

(Excerpts from Are You Happy Now? 10 Ways to Live a Happy Life)

Good questions to ask are:
-          What is true for you? Not what other people say, but what you say. No one else can say or has the right to say what’s true for you.
-          What is good for you? Again not what other people say is good for you (no matter how well meaning). No one else can say or has the right to say what is good for you.
-          What should your life path be? Again no one else can say or has the right to say what your life path should be.
-          What do you feel? How can anyone else know? And if they say they do, they are only guessing or projecting their own feelings on you. No one else can say or has the right to say what you should feel.

The way of it
The reality is also that we all know when we are following our passion or our heart’s desire because it feels right. Everyone has experienced this feeling of ‘rightness’ at some time in his/her life. It’s called integrity. And it’s easy to recognize. It’s a sense of real comfort. A feeling that life is good and that life is moving freely in and through you. It’s that feeling of ease, when you experience no discomfort, no obstructions, no limitations, no doubts. You know it’s good because it’s the free flow of life through you, as if the whole universe is working in and through you. And in truth, this is what is happening. This is the reality of it. Because when you are in the flow, everything in life is working in and through you and with you. And that’s what makes it feel so right.

Read the rest of Follow Your Passion and Accept the Consequences by Barbara Berger on Guest Articles page at

Barbara Berger is the best-selling author of The Road to Power – Fast Food for the Soul (published in 30 languages) and The Awakening Human Being – A Guide to the Power of Mind. Her highly acclaimed book, Are You Happy Now? 10 Ways to Live a Happy Life (already published in 14 languages) is being released in the US and the UK on August 16, 2013. The books can be ordered on For more about Barbara Berger see

The Wound is The Way

By Wendi Romero

From her latest book, Out of the Kiln

You may feel
you weep alone,
but indeed you do not.
All humanity cries out
when struck by
what there is
no control over.
The wound then
becomes the way—
the way to a deeper
current of Spirit
that flows beneath
the surface.
Its purpose is not
to destroy
but to restore;
not to remain ashes,
but return to wholeness.
Life’s circumstances
are not
life, itself.
What lives in you,
underneath the pain …
that is life.
That is you.

Wendi Romero is a lover of nature, travel, art, and photography. She grew up in rural Southwest Louisiana, where the culture is still predominantly French. She is a graduate of McNeese State University in Lake Charles, LA. There, she further developed her craft of creative writing and poetry under the tutelage of renowned poet, art critic, and photography historian, Dr. John Wood. Her first poem was published in 2008 in LISTEN, a publication for Spiritual Directors International. This is the poet’s first compilation of her work, but not her last. She and her husband live near the lush oak and pecan groves of Grand Coteau, LA. Visit her website and learn more about her book, Pilgrimage to Self: Leaving, Walking, Returning, at