Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Some Endings Are Happier New Beginnings

I’d like to share a brief story about Amazing Anne…
who went from the effects of abuse to Freedom.

Anne’s beginning in life may or may not be worse
than some people’s you know (or your own),
but it did have a happier New Beginning.

Before Anne began her breakthroughs, she didn’t believe
she had a right or a reason to feel good about herself.

Actually, somewhere deep inside she knew better,
which is why she reached out and took the action she did.

Anne’s courage is something I definitely celebrate!

Many people feel challenged when it comes to
feeling about and believing in themselves,
in the way they’d like to.

In Anne’s case, she also had the challenge of
coming from a verbally and physically abusive childhood,
which hung over her life like a heavy, dark shadow.

You’d be correct to say Anne’s self-esteem and self-confidence
were understandably low because of this.

And that she’d allowed her self-worth to be determined
by others, and how her life “appeared” to be—
and how awful she felt about herself—
instead of knowing her self-worth is a given.

Anne arrived at the moment in time when NOT
doing something about this
was way more painful than whatever
going for something better might take.

I recently got an email from Anne sharing that
she and her husband have fun together and laugh a lot.

This was NOT the case before she and I worked together.
In fact, this shift began to happen within just a few weeks
after we got started.

At first, her husband would look at her with puzzled expressions,
but this was because this
happier, calmer, more assertive woman—
who suddenly stopped binge eating when
upset or angry and who previously would never go out for fun,
not even to a restaurant, was now asking to do fun things
and doing them… and more.

His wife and his life were suddenly more fun and fulfilling,
and fulfilled, after decades of this not being the case.

Anne still shares with me how
she manages contrasts and conflicts that happen,
as well as the wonderful things
she creates for herself and her life.

Like at work… Co-workers and supervisors also noticed
a positive shift in her. She’d always had a work ethic,
but her attitude became so much more positive.
(Her latest performance review was outstanding!)

Anne also found it became much easier
to stand in her power
when it came to dealing with people
she’d previously let take her for granted.

In fact, Anne found she couldn’t NOT
look after her best interests.
She felt too strong and too good
to allow “stuff and nonsense” any more.

There were many, many more ways Anne shifted
during out time together, like exchanging
self-loathing for self-loving, which is HUGE!

Basically, the person Anne really is and always was
that was buried under layers of “stuff” from childhood
came out to live and to play.

We even discovered one quirky thing she can do
when she really wants to feel as confident as possible.
We joke about it, but it really works for her.

Anne’s commitment to herself was apparent
in her email messages, when she shared her
interest in working with me, but were made really
obvious to me in two big ways:

How she chose to invest in herself financially and
energetically during our time together.
Seriously… this woman meant business.

Anne stunned me when she told me
she’d decided to dedicate an entire paycheck
(1/2 of her monthly pay from her part-time job)
to do my specialized coaching program, and…

Mid-way through the 2-month coaching program,
she had minor surgery.
Don’t let the word “minor” fool you:
there was an extended recovery time
and extended physical therapy involved.

After the surgery I asked Anne if she wanted to
take some time off from the program and resume
once she’d had a chance to rest, especially because
she experienced pain.

She refused, saying this was HER time -
for inner healing, as well as physical healing.
As I said, her commitment to herself was strong…
stronger than any pain, in her mindset.

These two decisions of hers were ones I would
never ask anyone to do, but I had to honor
her decisions and her right to make them.

Anne’s happy ending of our time together, once
she completed the coaching program,
truly was a happier new beginning for her.

Fortunately, not everyone needs to free themselves
from such effects, just a load of limiting beliefs.

So, what happened during the 2 months?

I mentioned the “specialized” coaching program that
Fulfillment Is An Inside Job uses.

What this means is that I created specific questions
that open the door to deeper conversations.

And, as in Anne’s case, as it always is with coaching,
life still happens,
even when you try to focus on just one or two things.
So, we also worked on whatever came up for her—
because past, present, and future fit together.

Each week, on a specific day,
I’d send that week’s questions to her.
Anne would take a day or two to respond
then email the document back to me.
I’d read what she wrote and respond.

We usually communicated twice
about each week’s questions and responses,
in fact, that was the “norm.”

Then we’d move on to the next week,
until we’d moved through all 8 weeks.
(Anne kept everything so she can
re-read it from time to time and
see how far she’s come.)

Anne had lots of “smaller” breakthroughs along the way
(no breakthrough is ever small),
but she got the big breakthrough she wanted:
she rediscovered the real Anne and how
she wanted to feel about herself and her life.
And, she began to live this and still does!

She realized that everything – Everything – responds
to and stems from how you feel about you.

Whatever your start in life was like,
if you feel you’re ready now
for your own breakthrough to a happier new beginning,
send me an email with this in the subject line:
Why Me, Why Now.

You can write up to 1 page telling me
why a breakthrough is important to you
and why now.

I’ll work with up to 10 individuals at a time.
This is why I ask you to send your Why Me, Why Now message to me…
in case more than that number of you feel ready now,
so that I can be selective (based on commitment),
if that need arises.

If you’re not in this 10, you will definitely
be considered or put into the next round,
before anyone else.

Ideally, I’d like to send the questions to you
on the same day each week, starting Saturday, April 14.

However, if you’re ready to start sooner than that,
I’m not going to make you wait.
I certainly understand how it feels to want to
get going sooner than later.

But, I will stop at 10 people for the 2-month program.
This means if 10 people want to start now,
April 14 will be a moot point. We’ll start now.

All online, through emails: your computer, your schedule.
However, if you want to add one 30-minute coaching call
each week, we can arrange this.

Time – I’d say between 1 to 3 hours each week,
depending on how much you want to include in
your responses to the questions.
Money –
*If you want to do the program by email only
and need a payment plan,
which we can arrange - $400
*If you want to do the program by email only and
pay in full at the start - $375
*If you want to add coaching calls to the email program
(one 30-minute call each of the 8 weeks) –
$200 with the payment plan option (Total $600);
$175 if you pay in full at the start (Total $550)

What to Do Next:
Email your Why Me, Why Now message to me at .
Also, let me know these three things:
a) If you want to start now or on April 14;
b) If you will pay in full at the start or
need a payment plan, and what will work for you.
(I promise this will not influence your selection to participate);
c) If you want to include coaching calls
(this doesn’t influence your selection either).

If you want to start April 14,
email your message to me
no later than April 7.

If you want to start sooner,
email your message to me as soon as you write it.

If you want to start on April 14,
I’ll let you know about your selection
by Monday, April 9, along with how
to take care of payment to secure your place.

If you want to start sooner, I’ll help you do that.
I’ll stop accepting clients once I reach 10.

If you have any questions, please email me at

If you know someone who might be interested in
Fulfillment Is An Inside Job, please forward this email to them.

I look forward to assisting you to your own
happier-you breakthrough, if now is the time.

Joyce Shafer
Life Empowerment Coach
P.S. Just so you know… Anne is a real person,
though that’s not her real name.
She did give me permission to share “anything”
I wanted to about her story and experience.

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