Let's look at some ways to differentiate between
ego needs and soul needs.
Ego serves us in ways that move us to take actions
in our daily lives, actions meant to keep us alive and, ego hopes, thriving.
Ego seeks to feel a certain way,
often motivated by material and external demands that originate outside of or
aside from our soul desires, and this need leads to good choices and not so
good ones. It follows logic, and more often than not its own brand of logic
that desires to avoid pain or discomfort at all times and at all costs, rather
than conferring with our emotional heart. Ego speaks to us in ways like, "This
has got to change! Now!" From ego, we may sometimes be forceful in
striving for and achieving our aims. Ego does not always act from conscience:
it wants what it wants when it wants it.
Soul does not respond to force. It recognizes that
painful or unpleasant emotions are facets of all we are capable of feeling, like needed colors in a rainbow or
the largest box of crayons. Soul knows we are always in flow at that higher
level, that our experiences have specific and significant purposes for us; and
its aim is for us to thrive as whole beings (body, mind, and spirit) within the
bigger picture of life. It asks us to pay attention to everything we think,
feel, say, and do or don't do. It asks us to seek what fulfillment means for us
in all things and to listen to what our emotional heart tells us. Soul speaks
to us through our emotional heart using intuition and positive and negative
feelings. Negative feelings are as much a part of our soul-self's communication
system as positive feelings are. Soul always acts from conscience and conscious
awareness, and nudges us to strive to do the same.
Mainstream dissuades us from remembering that our
emotional heart is another form of intelligence we possess (in fact, our truest
form), one that knows us intimately, because it is us; whereas logic focuses on
what the (usually fearful) ego wants. Ego wants to fill any void with whatever
it believes will make it feel good or better as quickly as possible. Soul wants
us to empty out what no longer belongs inside us (to heal our wounded selves) and
to feel our way to what it is that truly needs to occupy that space that will
allow us to express and be our true selves. What fills our ego’s needs may not
fill our soul’s needs. What fills our soul’s needs eventually and inevitably takes
care of our ego’s needs, most especially by calming them.
Ego believes power comes from winning, from
creating and having positive experiences. Soul knows the Truth of our personal power
and its true Source, and seeks to integrate our inner and outer power through
learned wisdom into a desired collaboration between soul and ego as a way of
life. Soul knows nothing is truly ever lacking (only a belief in lack or
believing we deserve it gives lack “life”), and it strives to remind us of this
through sadness, frustration, depression, serenity, and joyful appreciation . .
. so that we seek the Truth and live from it.
Ego
says, "Get rid of any negative feeling immediately." Soul says,
"Be with your feelings in a gentle way so you can get quiet and hear my
message." Ego pushes us to look outside ourselves to define
who we are. Soul asks us to know ourselves and to fearlessly reveal who we are
to others through our words and actions, our talents and abilities, our visions
and goals. Ego says, "I don't love who I am, so I have to pretend to be
what I believe will be acceptable." Soul says, "No pretense ever
lasts. Be who you are and who you came here to be. Love yourself just as you
are now and are becoming." Ego says, "Fake it till you make it."
Soul says, "Start where you are and evolve and expand deliberately with
unafraid honesty and integrity."
Ego wants emptiness filled in a hurry because it
cannot tolerate it; it is disquieted by the unknown. Soul is not concerned with
the unknown; it trusts Source and has the spirit of adventure and discovery. Soul
knows that the fastest way to fill perceived
emptiness is to allow emptiness, to
surrender the ego’s needs about this when emptiness shows up, and appreciate
whatever value, guidance, and inspiration it presents. Perceived emptiness is
like dark matter in space: we can’t see it but it has its function or purpose
for being there. Your soul knows that appreciation of what-is is always
responded to with more to appreciate. Balance of soul and ego happens when we
align our inner perspective with ego's ability to take action that's in our best interest and for our highest evolution as we take next steps
on our personal path.
Explore how you can create collaboration and
alignment between your ego and soul, with thriving and flourishing on all
levels as their common goal for you, and see what gets created in you and your
life from this. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.
Practice makes progress.
© Joyce Shafer
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