Make Your Heart Sing

"Everything I do, I do to make my heart sing." This is a quote by Michael E. Angier, founder and chief inspiration officer of SuccessNet. I like this quote because it makes sense to me. However, I don't view it the way you might think.

I can see how someone might interpret this quote to mean they should either feel ecstatic about everything they do or they should elect to do only that which they believe or know will make them feel that way. For me, it represents a tool for self-inspiration.

Even if it doesn't appear as such, everything we do gets done because we choose to do it. We really could choose not to be responsible so as not to deal with paying the rent or mortgage, or meeting commitments. Even if something "makes" you feel terrible like going to a job you're discontent with, you still choose to go there every day.

There are occasions when I opt not to do something based on my needs or wants at that time. Even when I choose to do something I perceive as tedious or serious, I strive to look for an aspect about it that is congruent with head and heart alignment (though, sometimes this may take a while, depending on the emotions involved and the event). Head and heart alignment makes my heart sing; it makes me feel spiritually solid. Head and heart alignment, to me, is about being on purpose. It's about being true to my Self and feeling a sense of personal integrity.

So many people struggle with self-esteem, self-worth, self-confidence, and so forth. Look at those compound words. All of them begin with the Self. Everything, actually, begins with the Self. We're still healing—or need to—from the indoctrinated belief that considering ourselves first is Self-ish. It isn't, not if it’s done in the right way from the right mindset and spirit. For example, when we do something for another, or for any reason, either from guilt or fear of some kind (often of rejection), and resent doing it, we engage in a form of self-destruction. There's no head and heart alignment in that type of scenario, no way for the heart to sing, no way to feel authentic or spiritually solid.

"What's in it for me?" is the question sales motivators tell us is what is foremost in the minds of potential customers or clients. I use this question, especially when I find I'm involved in unpleasant or serious circumstances. At the very least, what can be in it for me is the opportunity to find my place of integrity; an opportunity to observe my thoughts, words, and actions; and an opportunity to see who I choose to be in each moment.

We've heard that even the most giving act is selfish because we do it to make ourselves feel good, or at least, that is the inevitable outcome. Everything we do has a symbiotic effect. There's no way to avoid that. There is a way to make it work for us. If you can approach every moment with a what's-in-it-for-me-at-a-deeper-level process, and do so with a broader purview as described above, and if your heart has seemed silent, prepare for it to sing with serenity, joy, and purpose more often. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.           

         

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

Go With vs. Get into the Flow

“Go with the flow” was and still is a popular thing to say and attitude to have. But what about “Get into the flow”? Is there really a difference? I say yes.

I think there is a difference, or at least, I feel one at an inner level, so trust that feeling in how I relate to my experiences. For me, going with the flow represents a couple of attitudes. One attitude is when things are going a certain way and you flow with it, say, like instead of trying to control what happens at a dinner party or picnic, you just allow the experience to unfold and are in the now with whatever happens. Another go-with-the-flow attitude is when something happens that your ego-aspect wants to resist but you release the resistance. This doesn’t mean you don’t take action, if action is needed, but you quiet your resistant ego-aspect and engage your mind and spirit instead so that you have presence of mind as needed.

What prompted me to perceive a difference between go with the flow and get into the flow was when I heard or read (I don’t recall how or who) “It’s not about what you can get from the flow, but that you get into the flow.” Often, we think of go with the flow as a way to get what we need or desire from the flow—the Universal Energy-Matching Marketplace—whether that’s a feeling or something tangible. But that has a certain passive energy to it. Get into the flow, for me, has a feeling of serene inner action that’s highly attractive to the Good that Source wants me to enjoy and benefit from. It says to me that I’m not just going along, but am engaged with aligning my energy with the flow, order, and creative consciousness of Source. It says I’m in partnership with Source. Maybe that’s just me, but I feel a true difference between the two statements. It’s the difference between having access to one or a few items you need or desire and having unlimited access to what you need or desire.

Ever have one of those moments, events, or days when it appears that if something can go wrong, it seems to? That’s a time when both go with the flow and get into the flow can make a difference, and for me, they happen in that order, if I wasn’t in the flow to start with—which happens. While living in New York City, I was to set up a booth at an event. The event was one I not only looked forward to but carefully planned for. My handouts, business cards, and artificial bonsai tree were packed and ready to go in my wheeled suitcase the day before the event. It was scheduled to start at noon and last until two o'clock; which meant I needed to be at the site for 11:30 so I could set up my table. I was ready!

The morning of the event, I went through my usual meditative routine, and included my mantra, used especially when I have to commute or travel: I'm always in the right place at the right time with the right action and the right people. Using the subway on a Saturday means you have to allow extra time for a slower commute; for me, about an 80-minute ride to my destination. If I left by 10 a.m., I'd have enough time for the ride and to walk to the site. I didn't leave my apartment until almost 10:15. Pulling my weighted suitcase on the bumpy sidewalk, I made it to the subway station, a 15-minute walk without a suitcase. The entrance was roped off because the interior was being painted. I'm always in the right place . . .

I repeated my mantra as I quickly pulled my suitcase the eight blocks north to the next subway stop, also roped off. My brain went into gear: There wasn't enough time for me to keep walking north until I found an open station. I didn't have enough cash on me to take car service as far as the site, nor did I want to pay around $70 for a ride that cost $2.50 on the subway. And, that was just one way.

A note on a post caught my attention: It advised subway riders to use one of the shuttle buses they provided because of this (I hadn’t seen that sign at my original subway entrance). I crossed the street to where others stood at a regular bus stop. A woman explained what I had to do. I checked my watch; it was 10:40. The bus pulled up, I got on, and asked the driver if he was taking us to the next transfer station where I could catch the train. "It's not running there,” he told me. “You have to go to the transfer station after that one." Only 18 blocks, but to my now-getting-a-little-concerned ego-aspect, it seemed like 18 miles. I'm always in the right place . . .

I hurried down the steps to the subway platform. An express train was there and I flew through its doors and got a seat. At the main transfer station, I changed to the express train that would take me to my stop on Manhattan's Upper West Side. It was 11:20 and I was at a station in Lower Manhattan when I realized there was no express service in the city on Saturday; we'd make every local stop.

Understand, I wasn't upset or losing it, though I was bemused; then I was amused as I realized this was an opportunity to really practice what I preach. There was no way I could arrive frazzled and tout coaching to get peaceful, poised, on purpose, and empowered. I laughed to myself and believed it would all be fine. I chose to have an inner and outer experience that I'm always in the right place . . . What was happening at the inner level up to this point was I was going with the flow—until I had this realization on the train. At that moment, I got into the flow.

Remarkably, I arrived at the site at 11:45, ready to get set up and meet and greet the people. The room wasn't ready, and everyone hosting a table stood around looking not too happy. We didn't get our room until 12:15. It took no time for me to set up, so I started helping everyone who said they needed extra hands. I was the only one there who seemed to be in a good mood; everyone else seemed or was stressed. I activated my clown chakra and got some of them to smile and several to laugh. I was not just going with the flow: I was in it, a part of it.

At first blush, it might have appeared that lots of things went wrong. However, every time something seemed to go awry, something terrific followed it, because of both going with and then being in the flow. I chose to be the experience I wished to have. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.          

         

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

Mind Your Mindset

Which thoughts do you start your day with? Which thoughts do you repeat to yourself most often? How are your thoughts working for you, or do they work against you?

One of the best things we can do for ourselves is get our thoughts aligned with our desired experiences, primarily, how we feel about ourselves, life, and Source—our inner experience, which is the only one we have absolute control over. Catherine Ponder’s book, The Secret of Unlimited Prosperity, does, of course, focus on aligning thoughts with prosperity, but it does much more than that, because your mindset influences your Good—all of it. Your Good is all of your resources: mind, energy, talent, skill, health, money, relationships, information, and experiences.

As many spiritual seekers and practitioners have realized, abundance, prosperity, health, and every other effect in our life is always influenced by a particular cause: Our mindset. To help you with this, I’m going to share with you a mix of Ponder material from this book, sometimes slanted with my preferred lingo and some personal comments. What I’m offering to you is a “formula” of sorts that you can read every morning as part of setting your mindset at the start of each day. To this end, I’m not going to use quotation marks to indicate what’s quoted—that could become cumbersome. Just know that most of what you’re about to read is from her book, with some personal alterations of mine, such as using Source rather than God, and is written in article form. Here we go.

Begin now to open your mind to the unlimited supply of the universe that is yours by divine right. Affirm often: I do not depend on persons or conditions for my supply. The One Source of Infinite Love is the source of my supply, and Source is constantly opening new channels of abundance and prosperity to me. I am open and receptive to my highest good now. There is no numbering of the avenues through which supply may come to me. My resource is as far-reaching as the universe. I expect my supply through all avenues of contact with life. Not from one specified point, not from two or more specified points; but from all points of the universe, unlimited supply is crowding upon me now. Source, I thank you for my unlimited increase in mind, energy, money, and affairs.

Your supply can come to you through expected channels, in expected ways, and it should. But your supply can also come to you through unexpected channels, in unexpected ways. From all points of the universe, your good is constantly crowding upon you. Give thanks that the universal spirit of abundance and prosperity is providing richly for you now.

The simple formula to use if you are not receiving the good you want in life: Ask what you can give to make way to receive your good. Then freely and quickly give it. There are those pious souls who believe that when they give, they are not supposed to expect to receive. And so, of course, they do not receive. Their very attitude blocks their good. State thankfulness every day for the benefit you can provide to one or more others, in ways appropriate for them and you. Your abundance and prosperity is from Source. Your abundance and prosperity is omnipresent. You give, through tithes of money and or of yourself, so you have a right to receive immediate abundance and prosperity. You choose to now allow this and receive all the good Source has for you and wants to give to you.

When you LIVE (not just know) the law of attraction, you never need to go seeking—your own always comes to you. This has been my personal experience. When I relax, trust, and allow Source to work in my behalf, it’s a very different experience than when I struggle and strain, and it is or can be the same for you. This is a key point: It’s not about what you can get from the flow, but that you get into the flow. Dwell upon the goodness of Source in yourself and others. Think about and expect success, whatever that means to you, and for any or every area of your life and how you feel about yourself. Radiate the attracting mental atmosphere that draws success. As Emerson wrote, “Great hearts send forth steadily the secret forces that incessantly draw great events.”

Dr. Ernest C. Wilson said this about the law of mental attraction: “…when you dissolve the barriers of repellent thought and substitute a receptive attitude of mind, good things come to us in unexpected and wonderful ways, and sometimes with a promptness that is astonishing.” How do you clear up mental resistance which has repelled your good? You must begin by picturing the best for yourself and for others. Stop picturing yourself as weak or misunderstood. Stop dramatizing yourself as a martyr. If you want to be thought of as long-suffering, you will always have something to suffer about. Begin anew picturing the good and expecting it.

When we change what we think, we change what we attract. Although we cannot force good into our life, we can invite it by dwelling on it. When we do this, our good appears sometimes in amazing ways. Practice this statement: I invite the powerful, loving action of Source into my life, and every need is met. I expect the best and attract the best in every experience.

Psychologists say that when you think you have been rejected (by others, life, and even yourself), you have subconsciously rejected something. Your good never rejects you. If you cannot accept your promised land mentally, you cannot enter it. This explains why some people demonstrate Truth and some do not. Those who get results are those who have released the past and have accepted mentally the possibility of new good. Those who hang on to the past, reject their good, and reject Source’s help in trying to give it to them, never do get the good they seek.

Your good has not rejected you, but you may have rejected it by holding on to someone or something of the past or present. You may be holding on because of resentment, hate, un-forgiveness, criticism, or emotional attachment. That which you complain about keeps you out of your promised land; that which you possessively hold on to keeps you out of your promised land. If you continue to hold on to it, you will never realize the greater health, wealth, and happiness that are your divine right.

Are you so attached to old patterns of living that you cannot get along comfortably without them? Are you emotionally attached to lack and illness? If you truly want abundance, prosperity, and health, do you still gain satisfaction from self-pity over your financial or health problems? You must give up something to make way for health, abundance, and prosperity—probably self-pity and bitterness; probably the belief that you have had a hard time. Source can only do for you what Source can first do through your mental attitudes.

When we’ve reached the point where we take only the good in each experience and let the rest go, how swift and joyous will be our progress toward the realization of a happy, harmonious life. Start thinking about your life the way you want it to be. The way to accept mentally your promised land is simply to change your point of view. Recognize another set of circumstances or events as possible; then dwell upon that possibility. When you have accepted your good mentally, it will quickly appear. Suddenly it will all be done, and with one bold stroke you will find yourself in your promised land.

Realization precedes manifestation. A realization of Truth will banish every ill, and the prayer or affirmation through which realization comes is the prayer or affirmation that asserts the Truth, and is mentally accepted as Truth. Take only the good from each experience and let the rest go. Begin now to recognize another set of circumstances as possible, and refuse to be hypnotized by appearances. Mentally accept and claim your highest good now, and allow your progress to be swift and joyous. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.          

         

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

Mental Attitude, Beliefs, and Faith: A Foolproof Way to Shift What You Believe in Your Favor

What do mental attitude, beliefs, and faith have as a common denominator? Self-talk—that great self-saboteur. Ready to take your conscious and subconscious self-talk to a whole new level?

Often, the topics of mental attitude, beliefs, and faith can feel like something outside of us. Let’s place these firmly within us, where they belong, and as the power generators they are intended to be for us.

How can you know for certain what it is that you really believe? Well, what you really believe is what you practice, consciously (objectively) or subconsciously (subjectively). What you practice is what you have faith in; but, this is a statement that’s more involved than you might think. Ernest Holmes said this about faith in his book, The Science of Mind: “When you analyze faith you find that it is a mental attitude against which there is no longer any contradiction in the mind that entertains it.” What often happens is that we aren’t aware of the subjective contradictions hidden within our mental attitude, sometimes in plain sight. What if there’s a way to shine the light of Truth on subjective contradictions in a way that empowers you as never before? A few paragraphs from now, I’m going to show you how you can do this.

What are some of the things we typically have faith in, when we consider faith to be a mental attitude absent of contradictions? Well, some of them are supportive and some of them are not. As a non-supportive example, we have faith in fear. Do you immediately feel you want to contradict that statement? How’s this for evidence, then? Keeping in mind that faith is a mental attitude about something your mind has no contradiction with: Do you have faith that your job security is not secure? (More about security in a moment.) Do you have faith that you’ll never be financially serene? Do you have faith that you’ll never have the quality relationship (with whomever) that you desire? Do you have faith that you’ll never experience health and well-being in the way you desire? Do you have faith that your strength, support, and/or supply come from others? What else might you add here that your mental attitude has no subjective contradiction with, no matter what you affirm and know you desire?

Still keeping in mind that faith is a mental attitude about something that your mind has no contradiction with: What about your faith in your talents, skills, creative abilities? Do you have faith that you can do or perform well anything you’re good at? Do you have faith that you can learn new things? Do you have faith that you can handle well the tools of your trade you are familiar with? Do you have faith that you can do the everyday things you usually do?

There are many, many things about you and what you do that you do so naturally and automatically that you seldom give thought to them or, perhaps, ever feel and express your appreciation about them. Anything, no matter how small or large or significant or seemingly insignificant that you do (and maybe take for granted) is always a demonstration of a mental attitude (belief, faith) that your mind has no contradiction with. How did you reach this attitude?

You demonstrated it to yourself; and more than likely, this demonstration had you start from where you were, whatever your age was or means were at the time, and involved practice until whatever it was you were learning became natural and automatic for you. Even if there sometimes were challenges about it, you still felt sure enough about yourself and your abilities to meet each challenge. Maybe it even felt like a creative challenge, and you felt good and took pride and enjoyment from meeting it.

Holmes also wrote this about faith, which he wrote in all capital letters, but that was before the electronic age we enjoy today, when All Caps are now associated with shouting at people: “Faith is a mental attitude which is so convinced of its own idea—which so completely accepts it—that any contradiction is unthinkable and impossible.” There are things you believe about yourself, life, and Source that you completely accept—subjectively (subconsciously). You can see how this can work against you or for you.

A unique, powerful way to assist you whenever you need to shift your thoughts out of a negative mental attitude is to insert the words “I have faith that” before any negative thought you’re holding. For example, let’s say you’re anxious about an upcoming meeting. Your ego-aspect is fearful that it won’t go well. How does it feel to make that a statement that proclaims “I have faith that this meeting won’t go well for me.” That’s a whole different energy, when you put specific words to what you’re feeling, isn’t it? If you preface any fearful, negative, or non-supportive statement with “I have faith that…,” such as in this example about the meeting, how will you behave differently than if you don’t have that mental attitude, that “faith” that it won’t go well for you?

Imagine saying the following, or give it a try now, as you read these statements, and see how it feels to proclaim them:

·         I have faith that I don’t have Self worth.

·         I have faith that I don’t deserve the good Source wants me to have.

·         I have faith that finances are a struggle for me.

·         I have faith that health is a problem for me.

·         I have faith that success is hard or impossible.

·         I have faith that I won’t recover from this experience I’m having.

·         I have faith that negativity (anger, bitterness, sorrow) is my path, and that I’ll never get over this or release this.

Every time you have and hold a negative thought, you’re actually making an opposing “faith” statement—a proclamation, without realizing it. You could keep going with more of these statements of your own, but you see how a part of you really wants to go in another direction from such opposing “faith” statements. Somewhere inside you, a voice shouts, “No! No! No! That is NOT what I want or want to believe.” Or maybe the voice shouted, “I absolutely DO NOT believe that, nor do I choose to!” At least, I hope that’s what you experienced. Whenever you make a positive affirmation but don’t put it into practice as a mental attitude, you’re being guided by a subjective opposing “faith” statement, and that’s what you practice, without realizing it.

How does it feel to make these statements?

·         I have faith that Source loves me unconditionally.

·         I have faith that Source supports and supplies me, and is my only True resource because ALL is Source; ultimately, there is ONLY Source.

·         I have faith that I am a good person, worthy of all the good things Source has made available for me to use and enjoy.

·         I have faith that I can make wise and/or appropriate choices on my behalf.

·         I have faith in my particular talents, skills, and abilities.

·         I have faith that I have the resources I need and in right timing.

·         I have faith that with Source, which is ALWAYS on my side, my True security in any area of my current life and my eternal life is always assured.

What else might you add to this regarding what you have faith in about you, life, and Source? What would you like to add or choose to add? If there’s a statement you want to add but feel a contradiction about it, practice the opposing “faith” statement first so you can feel the “No!” then shift it to a statement you have no contradiction with.

Maybe you currently have health issues, financial issues, or any other kinds of issues you’re contending with. Having any issue, no matter your attitude, is not a sign of failure: You must look with larger vision at this. You must keep in mind or re-Mind yourself, as Catherine Ponder wrote, not to be hypnotized by appearances. Having a particular mental attitude may or may not quickly shift your experience or even shift it in the way your ego-aspect prefers, but it will shift YOU in the ways that benefit you most as a Spiritual Being, and be long-lasting.

Use the faith statement method offered above to assist you with this. As Holmes wrote, faith “is a dynamic fact.” This means your mental attitude is a dynamic fact. With faith and mental attitude practiced in this way, the number and level of fears and negative beliefs you may have carried for years begin to diminish and are replaced with serenity, joy, enthusiasm, trust; and the good you’ve been waiting for begins to show up, whether as an outer manifestation or an inner one that you feel. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.          

         

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

What Really Blocks the Good Stuff From You and Your Life?

Maybe you’ve been on the spirituality/metaphysical/Law of Attraction path for quite a while, yet don’t feel as in the flow as you’d like to or that it’s easy to get in the flow, no matter what you know. What’s up with that?

You may or may not like what this is really about, but until you take hold of it to help you move forward, you’ll likely stay frustrated in one or more areas of your life. Ernest Holmes got right to it when he wrote, “We are One with the Universe, and that Spirit flows through us at the level of our recognition and embodiment of it…. Spirit expresses itself through each individual at the level of his [or her] consciousness.”

Okay, so we have to face the truth that this is akin to water seeking and meeting its own level, which means the energy of what’s going on to us, for us, and through us meets our own consciousness level. And the only place energy and consciousness can increase is within us, by choice, intention, and commitment. So what blocks this from happening easily for us?

Ernest Holmes (again) said “The Spirit can do for us only what IT can do through us. Unless we are able to provide the consciousness, IT cannot make the gift.” Catherine Ponder said it this way: “God can only do for you what He can first do through your mental attitudes.” This leads us to look at our habit of thought, or said another way, our mental/emotional attitudes.

What happens when things are not going well for you? Your ego-aspect runs amok, for one, whether it’s about the state of your health, finances, business, job, relationships, and so on. It resists what’s happening, probably in a big way. Maybe it blames others, who may have been triggers, but it doesn’t want to take any responsibility, or take as much as it might, for perpetuating your mental/emotional discomfort. Maybe it expresses envy about others who aren’t having the same experiences (and ignores other experiences they may be having). Maybe it goes into self-pity and stays there. Maybe it starts talking in statements (thoughts) that oppose (are opposite of) your good and won’t shut up.

I just learned about a book and method called The Emotion Code by Dr. Bradley Nelson, which I’ll read soon. You can look up his videos on YouTube (especially check out the one called “Emotion Code example” that runs almost 12 minutes). He points out that some of what blocks us may not even be ours. Wouldn’t that please the ego?! But, it could be true. It’s now ever more widely believed that we inherit more than just physical aspects through our DNA, we inherit non-physical ones, as well, such as beliefs. That sense of lack or any prevalent negativity you feel and haven’t been able to shake that you wear like a wool overcoat, for any area in life, may not be yours. You could be living your life according to one or more patterns that aren’t yours and can be easily released.

But, there are your own patterns to consider, as well. What happens when you hold onto resentment, fear, un-forgiveness, criticism, or any negative emotional attachment to any part of your past (and the past can be five minutes ago)? You create one or more blocks that cause you to unwillingly, unknowingly reject YOUR good that Source is eager to deliver to you, whether that’s health, finances, or whatever area of life you feel blocked in. Maybe you believe it’s more spiritual to give than receive, rather than realize it’s a loop of energy, so you block receiving. Any or all of these, when practiced, are why you ask and ask—maybe plead and plead, yet “it” doesn’t happen the way you desire and which your spiritual self knows it’s designed to and is meant to.

Neale Donald Walsch said that blocks we bump into are requests for our attention on unfinished business. More often than not, that unfinished business is about our mental/emotional attitude (but it could also be an emotion code). We’ve got crud in our stream that blocks the flow of our energy and our good, blocks our ability to be in flow and receive our good. So we keep asking and asking Source for what we need or desire, and Source patiently waits for us to clear the way for its delivery. Sometimes, we relax enough for some of our good to squeeze through to us. Maybe we recognize this for the demonstration of a mental/emotional attitude it is, or maybe we don’t.

Forgive yourself for not knowing better, as well as for anything you’ve been rejecting about yourself. Release others from your rejection of them, because like you, they picked up patterns that weren’t theirs, as well as sometimes just didn’t have a bleeping clue about what they were doing to themselves, much less to others, just as we all sometimes experience. Release the crud that your ego finds so tantalizing to dwell on and in. Swap those thoughts, every time they surface, with better thoughts, especially with the thought that you, from now on, choose to learn what you can, and will keep only the good from everything. Choose to now accept the possibility of what’s new and good. As Catherine Ponder also said, “Although we cannot force good into our life, we can invite it by dwelling on it.” Our good, our success, our relationship with Source are not usually what many dwell on most of the time.

When we dwell on and in opposing thoughts to our good, we create experiences that the ego takes as rejection from outside of us, when in fact it is we who are doing the rejecting of something, from a subconscious level. And what we reject for ourselves is actually something we reject about ourselves, because of patterns of beliefs we carry that need to be shed or shifted. Source would NEVER and will never reject us. So, it is us doing the rejecting. That’s worth looking into.

We also have to let go of the idea that our good can come to us from only one source or only a few sources. Source’s resources are INFINITE and always available to us, according to what is appropriate for us, which is something our spiritual self is directly involved in determining, not Source. As far as Source is concerned, if we ask and have the consciousness to allow and receive it, it’s ours. But we do have an inner coach (our Spirit) calling the game for our particular experience and evolution. Only when our ego-aspect works in opposition to our own inner spiritual coach do we hit roadblocks and detours. And even if some of our experiences are not what our ego-aspect would ever sign up for, our relationship with our inner spirit self allows us to say, “Show me.” And we can glean from our experiences that which will help us evolve in the way we came here to do, in each moment.

Another gem from Catherine Ponder about this is, “You do not so much attract what you want as what you are—according to your secret thoughts.” Any negative secret thoughts come from that chatterbox we call the ego-aspect. It gnaws on our mental and emotional attitudes the way beavers gnaw on trees. And it’s just as effective at damming (and damning) the flow as the dams beavers build. From Emma Curtis Hopkins, we get these wise words: “The world in which we live is the exact record of our thoughts. If we do not like the world we live in, then we do not like our thoughts.” This can be both a discomforting and comforting realization. But it also inspires us to monitor and shift our thoughts in order to shift our experiences.

I’m not just “whistling Dixie” about this topic: I’ve bumped up against it in a big way (more than a few times—if I had a dollar for every time…). As an image posted on a social site said, “If you’re still looking for that one person who will change your life, take a look in the mirror.” I had to look at how much of what I’ve learned and know is floating on the surface of my consciousness, meaning what I’ve yet to integrate as a mental attitude or way of being versus what I have integrated. And like me, maybe you’re doing this as well, not realizing that you aren’t, at times, actually practicing what you know the Truth to be (and instead are letting ego drive your bus); that knowing the Truth is never enough to get you where you want to go—you have to live the Truth to make the journey you truly desire to make.

I can say that this, as Ponder wrote, has been my (repeated) experience: “…when we dissolve the barriers of repellent thought and substitute a receptive attitude of mind, good things come to us in unexpected and wonderful ways, and sometimes with a promptness that is astonishing.” Now, I just have to practice remembering this and living it more than I sometimes do, and especially when I’ve allowed my ego-aspect to get my mental and emotional knickers in a knot.

Why don’t we practice what we know as we should or could? It’s because we often practice opposing thoughts yet are unaware of this because of the emotions we feel and are justified to feel, but get stuck there. We may practice patterns that may or may not be ours. What also blocks us is if we have somehow become locked into the negativity of others. In the Bible, there’s the story of Jesus going to the home where the daughter had died. When he got there, all the mourners told him there was nothing he could do about it. He knew differently, but he also knew something else; and this knowledge caused him to kick everyone out so he could do what he knew he could. It’s not always easy to put an end to or remove ourselves from the negativity in our lives, but it is imperative to do this as much as we can so we can function and perform what we know we’re capable of. Not doing something to shift negativity or remove ourselves from its influence is more often than not a form of self-rejection (ouch!), not necessarily stoicism, which does have its place, but is a wholly different energy.

So, we need to look at the blocks we practice without realizing it or without realizing how fully they affect us, such as self-rejection, in all its forms and influences. We need to look at how much we carry the past around with us and resolve to release all but the good we can extract from past experiences. We need to look at our attachment to self-pity and shift this by embracing our relationship with Source and allowing Source to supply and support us. We need to discover whether or not patterns we practice are actually ours or if we picked them up from others, and then release these patterns, no matter their origin. We need to become better at identifying our opposing thoughts and replacing them with supportive ones. And, we need to love and accept ourselves as we are and as we evolve, and honor this, be available to it. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.          

         

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

The Power of Reframing Your Reality

If you're not familiar with what reframing is, I have a quote from American Actress Shelley Winters that is an example: "I'm not overweight. I'm just nine inches too short."

Why would anyone need to reframe what-is? Reality is what it is, isn't it? Maybe. We know that how we perceive things is how we experience them. This is why two people can see or hear the same thing and respond or react differently. Sometimes, this means we ignore the obvious, perhaps make excuses. Other times, it means the story we tell ourselves causes us to feel bad rather than better. When your attention is primarily on things as they are, or seem to be, you block expansion of what-is and what is possible.

Reframing is so very important because if we don’t put it into practice, we can exhaust ourselves or make ourselves ill as a result of all the opposing thoughts to what-is that we have and repeat to ourselves and others. Our opposing thoughts can, instead, get our attention onto the fact there is deep-level resistance going on about what-is, and it’s likely about something we feel we can’t change or are afraid to change. Viktor Frankl gave us his renowned quote that relates to reframing: “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

During the course of a day, or a lifetime, we tell ourselves a lot of things. Maybe we say we can't be happy, confident, serene, or whatever we want to feel until we lose 20 pounds, have a certain bank balance, or reach whatever parameter we place out ahead of us. Will we attain our goals and dreams faster and easier if we delay feeling the way we want to until we accomplish what we aim to? Even if this doesn’t cause delay, why feel bad in the process? We waste time and energy waiting for circumstances and ourselves to be perfect or ideal so that we can feel good “when” instead of feeling that way now. Neale Donald Walsch said, “Happiness is not produced by conditions; conditions are produced by happiness.”

"It is impossible to be both grateful and depressed. Those with a grateful mindset tend to see the message in the mess. And even though life may knock them down, the grateful find reasons, if even small ones, to get up." – Steve Maraboli

A good time to reframe is when an outcome is less than we expect or hope for. Times such as these are not "failures," but valuable information-gathering experiences. (Did you notice how the last sentence used reframing?) You can choose to make every outcome or process work for you rather than against you. This may not feel natural or simple, but if you do it, you'll move forward rather than stand still. That is the real power of reframing. “The only thing that ever prevents your receiving something that you desire is that your habit of thought is different from your desire,” said Abraham-Hicks.

Reframing takes us out of the mono-vision we can get locked into. If we look around, we see lots of people enjoying themselves in ways we're putting off until... Do you know anyone who is not a millionaire, but is happy? Do you know any men or women without perfect bodies who are happy and in romantic relationships? Do you know anyone with a health or physical issue who not only gets around, but enjoys as fulfilling a life as possible? One thing can be assumed about such people: they tell themselves a story that is different from what someone else may tell themselves. They are reframing experts. Aristotle advised, “What we expect, that we find.”

Pick something you're putting off feeling better about until you reach a specific outcome. Choose to feel good just as things are and just as you are. This doesn't mean you don't still aim at your desired outcomes, it means you give yourself permission to enjoy yourself and your life right now, and feel and express appreciation, which is the ultimate vibration to send out, whatever the circumstances. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.         

         

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer

Every Fear Hides a Wish

The article title is a line of dialogue from a movie. I shared it with a friend who emailed back, "What does THAT mean?" So, let’s consider what it may mean to you and to all of us.

It could mean we wish the opposite of what we're afraid of were true instead. Or, if we fear instability in some area of our lives, perhaps we wish security in this matter was etched in stone so we never had to think about it or fear it again. It could mean we're in denial. Denial of what-is and of what we feel is never a good thing. It leads to more of the same or worse happening because we aren’t addressing what needs to be addressed. Denial of what-is or what we feel makes us feel and behave like a victim, of any circumstance and of ourselves.

Dealing with a fear (or managing it) is something we can develop inner tools for. Making wishes become realities is also something we can do if we apply ourselves at the inner and outer levels. So what would be the next step in considering this?

In my opinion, whether it’s a fear or a wish we’re considering, I think that ultimately we want to feel strong. We want to feel a level of self-trust so that fears and wishes are matters we readily address but perhaps differently than we may have before. It all boils down to one underlying thing: We doubt we can or will be able to handle ourselves physically, mentally, emotionally, or even spiritually in the face of certain challenges, be it a fear we feel or a wish we desire to be a reality.

Self-trust and security have a partnership. Security, as much as our ego self would like it to be an outer experience, is really an inner one, and it’s based on or in self-trust, and trust in Source. Everything changes; and that can rattle our sense of security pretty darn fast. However, when we KNOW our sense of security (or, perhaps preferably, serenity) comes from within, change might stir (or roil) the waters of our life, but we know we can restore inner balance by pulling from the strong foundation of who we know ourselves to be, and especially, our trust in Source. When we have a defined level of self-trust and trust in Source, we know we can manage ourselves through any gust or gale. Our self-trust and trust in Source is our security, and our serenity. And when we have the mindset that any step we take or choice we make will lead us to learn something about ourselves so we can grow, we realize we cannot ever fail.

Perhaps the next time you feel a fear, look for which wish accompanies it; though, you’ll likely find the ultimate wish is that you believe in yourself enough to trust you can handle whatever comes your way, whether that’s to take an action that creates a positive shift or to choose to release something or someone from your life that or who is taking life force from you rather than contributing to your joy and fulfillment.

Ask yourself how you truly want to feel about any matter. Then ask yourself what stops you from feeling that way now. You may quickly realize the only thing that stops you is that you made a choice based on your level of self-trust, even if that choice was to believe you are confused. You can give yourself permission to feel the way you wish to feel, no matter what, and trust yourself and Source. You can realize there are only steps that lead you to grow and learn. Try it. Watch what happens in your life as a result. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.        

         

Practice makes progress.

© Joyce L. Shafer