There are crossroad moments in life, but there are
also moments that have a stronger dynamic than that. These are moments when you
face major decisions about giving up or giving out or going forward in life.
"A crisis only
becomes a breaking point when we fail to use it as a turning point," wrote
Guy Finley. Most of us have had a moment when we faced, or may now face, this
truth. Depending on what’s going on, we can feel weakened, either momentarily
or for longer; and we may have to dig deep for the courage and self-love to
head toward the direction of a balance point. Along with this, it takes an act
of courage to reach out to others when we feel weakened so that we can get
strong again, as author and motivational speaker Les Brown reminded us. That’s
not always easy or comfortable to do, especially if you have self-worth issues
about your deservedness or a belief that you have to be perceived as perfect,
which means you erroneously believe you must never have or demonstrate feelings
other than those of empowerment.
Sometimes, what gets
us to feel we’re approaching a breaking point is a series of events that seem
to pile up. Sometimes, it's one event. Sometimes, it’s both, which has been my
recent experience. Either scenario can make us feel that we're going to break
open or break apart. That's why I was especially appreciative to reread
Finley's and Brown’s words. I’ve had to reach out to select others lately, in
order to stay strong during a particularly challenging time. I’ve had to look
at my role in the dynamics and own it, which has been painful but transforming;
but doing this empowers me in many ways. What I've been facing can be viewed as
a problem (breaking point) or as an impetus (turning point) to do something
that's needed to be done for quite a while. In its specific way, my situation
is a signal to turn and aim my life in a direction that is more appropriate for
me, as though I can hear the words whispered on the wind, "Your life is
calling you." Along with the emotions I’ve experienced, I’ve also been
able to see the gifts and the hand of Source at work for my and the highest
good.
It's somewhat
frightening and exhilarating to stand in this place. Like that phrase that
refers to leaping and finding you can fly. The encouraging words of support and
love that have been coming to me from family and friends, and messages sent by
Source in its very special way, help me remember how blessed I am in my life,
how much I have to appreciate. And I realize one of the biggest blessings is
that I can recognize this.
I haven’t popped right
into "positive energy and emotions only" mode as yet, nor will I put
that unrealistic demand or burden on myself: There are still things to resolve
and healing work to be done. I know that staying in an agitated state won’t fix
anything and is potentially damaging to the body, as well as every area of life.
Einstein's words come back to me, "No problem can be solved from the same
level of consciousness that created it." I can't keep doing the same
things and expect different results; none of us can. And I can tell you that
making specific changes has not been received well by one and all, though,
support for the needed changes is strong from others; though, that shouldn’t be
required in order for any of us to take strength in any choice we make that’s
in our best and highest interest. In fact, making specific changes has set
other dynamics into motion, as is wont to happen; but I completely trust Source
to continue to support me, as well as act for the highest good of all involved.
Why is it that we
sometimes feel compelled to wait to make changes until we have to? I'm one who
believes everything has a purpose, so there's no judgment in that question. I
can think of lots of reasons we might do that. Sometimes the reasons include
being a kind, caring person who doesn’t like to give up, which means the person
also doesn’t know that necessary endings are natural and, well, necessary,
whether that’s a complete ending or ending only what doesn’t work. Sometimes
it’s because a co-dependent (toxic) relationship has been formed, whether
personal or professional, and any number of fears get in the way, preventing a
needed shift from happening. Sometimes it’s because we live from the outside in
rather than from the inside out, which puts the quality of our life into the
hands of others instead of in our own hands and in partnership with Source.
Sometimes it’s to get our attention onto an inner healing that is needed, which
of course could result in any or all of the above reasons I listed here. I'm certainly
now aware of my reasons, and I'm directing my energy in a way that lets me move
forward, however this challenge unfolds.
If you experience a moment, or are
in one now, that feels like a breaking point, what might you do to make it your
turning point? It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.
Practice makes progress.
© Joyce L. Shafer
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