Do your
days feel ordinary? Do you feel there are too few blessings in your life? Maybe
you'd like to shift this.
Let's
look at the second part of the article title first. We tend to put a lot of
energy into naming what we want (often stated as "don't haves") and
not a lot of energy into naming what we have. We are surrounded by people and
advertising, obvious and subtle, that promotes this as a natural or expected
way to be and feel. The result is that we wake each morning, go about our days,
and go to sleep with very little appreciation for what we have and we may, in
fact, dwell on the opposite, that is, what we perceive as the negatives.
We
believe, which is really mimic others and repeat behaviors we learned, that
it's natural or responsible to focus on what's "wrong" with us,
everyone else, and in certain areas of our lives or life itself. This is so
prevalent that we miss or discount what is right in us, others, and life. We
learned to complain (rather than occasionally vent) to anyone who'll listen or
happens to be where we are, maybe about the same things over and over. We're so
focused in this way that, often, our perspective about what-is, as well as what
can be, gets skewed, and our ability to be creative about solutions,
resolutions, or improvements gets diminished.
Kurt
Wright explained in his book, Breaking
the Rules, that we use our rational minds to judge, to assign value as
right/wrong, good/bad rather than use that part of our mind as it was designed:
To convey "facts into and back out of our intuition," so that we use
our whole-mind function rather than just the analytical mind, which has been
scientifically proven unable to discern fact from fiction. The result is that
we disallow "good judgment" to happen. Judgment, in its most
beneficial form, is there to help us figure out what fits and doesn't, in an
ongoing, ever-evolving assessment of a desired ideal. When we go straight into
right/wrong, good/bad judgment, we block our intuition's ability to respond to
beneficial questions like, "What else might be going on here? What might
the bigger picture be? What feels appropriate for me, or inappropriate? What
would have to happen for me to feel head-and-heart alignment about this, or at
all?"
Recognizing
what you have doesn't mean you aren't aware of what you'd like to shift so that
you have more desirable experiences and results. In fact, the greater your
appreciation is for what you have, the greater your ability is to solve,
resolve, and make productive shifts. We want more blessings in our life, but do
we notice (name) the ones we have? Do we embrace them? To those who have
appreciation, more to appreciate is given.
One way
to name your blessings, as wisely stated by Joel Osteen, is to as often as
possible, exchange the words HAVE TO with GET TO. Think about what this really
means in the greater scheme of life around the world. You don't have to go to
work, you get to go to work (you're able to receive income and perhaps perks).
You don't have to do your studies, you get to do them (education is available).
You don't have to wake up, you get to wake up (you're alive another day, with
its opportunities). You don't have to interact with your children or other
members of your family, you get to interact with them (your loved ones are
still with you). You don't have to work with clients or customers, you get to
(people want what you provide). Recall the last thing you said you had to do
and say "get to" instead of "have to." How does that feel?
Example: I have to grocery shop vs. I get to grocery shop, which means I get to
walk into a store and easily reach for what I want or need rather than have to
grow, raise, process, or preserve all of it; and I have the means to do this.
What else
in your life do you say you Have to do that, with a perspective shift, you
realize you Get to do? See? Hear? Breathe? Feel? Think? Love? Appreciate? Pay
for products and services that benefit your life? Use your limbs? How many moments
do you experience that go unnoticed or unappreciated by you?
This
leads to the first part of the article title: Number Your Days. The quote comes
from the Bible, Psalm 90:12 "Teach us to number our days aright, that we
may gain a heart of wisdom." This is about appreciating each day. It's
about realizing what author Dan Millman realized: "There are no ordinary
moments." I add: only ordinary perspectives.
We are so
involved with our thoughts about matters and things, mostly negative thoughts,
that we miss the fact that every moment we have is extraordinary—and numbered.
None of us know the number of our days or the days of others. It's not that
we're to use this as our motivation to behave better out of a sense of
obligation or guilt, but to let awareness of this motivate better, more joyful
behavior and deeper appreciation, to place greater value on our moments and
blessings than we have been. I'm not saying we should appreciate anything
that's intolerable or inappropriate (though, we can appreciate that we can discern
this and make a choice in favor of our well-being); this is about the gifts in
our life that we don't recognize and name as such.
You woke
up today. It's likely you were able to get out of bed without assistance. Same
for going to the bathroom; or if you needed assistance, it's likely you had it.
It's likely you showered or bathed inside your residence, with water you could
adjust temperature-wise to suit you. You probably had coffee and food in your
kitchen or easy access to someone who provided them. Maybe you drove, rode a
bike, used public transportation, or walked to work, even if that's in the next
room. Maybe you interacted with a loved one or cherished friend, or will during
the day. The list can go on and on. It's up to you to practice naming your
blessings, small and large. It's up to you to practice seeing your days and
moments as numbered and, therefore, not in the least ordinary.
Today,
and everyday, take time to appreciate what you have, especially what you
usually don't think about or often take for granted. Consider the habit of not
getting out of bed until you find at least one reason to feel deep appreciation
rather than start your day with grumbling or trepidation. Make a moment to
state appreciation to someone—it matters. It makes a difference, for them and
for you. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.
Practice makes progress.
© Joyce Shafer
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